Category: Work

Odds and Ends

I have left a few open-ended posts and events “out there” the last few weeks, so here is a wrap up, on all those issues.

For our fifth year anniversary, Joe and I both had such a busy week; it kind of snuck up on us. We realized we didn’t have a babysitter. My dad tried to rearrange his work schedule so he could baby sit at the last minute for us, but it didn’t work out. So we took the kids to the mall, where they got to play in the play area and at Pottery Barn Kids. Then we got pizza at California Pizza Kitchen.

So we had a nice night- it was kind of special to think back five years ago we were at our wedding and now we were sharing our special day with the two lil’ monkey’s we love the most- our little boys. 🙂 Ryan was interested in the wedding pictures I was putting on the blog, so I got to talk to him about our wedding.

We also passed a Crocs vendor in the mall, which had every size Crocs in every color imaginable. Cole loves trying on and walking around in Ryan’s Crocs, so we couldn’t resist any longer and picked him up his own pair in Peacock Blue- here is a picture of him the next day with his first pair of Crocs.

We also got the window repaired on my car. Our mechanic is wonderful, and we have had some issues in the past, where I bought the car in when something wasn’t working and they have fixed it for free! One time a vacuum hose was broken and the air conditioning was only blowing out of the defrost vent. So I knew a broken window regulator was going to cost, but it was almost $500 after parts and labor. Ouch. I feel like the mechanic is honest though, and I am sure we would have been charged at least this much, if not more anyplace else. Also, since they have fixed things free for us before, of course I wanted to give them the business. What are you going to do? I need a window, and the duct tape and hanger was giving out, after my drive to work. 🙂

Speaking of work, I absolutely love, love it. I love the work- stimulating, but not over my head, with variety. The other day while I was working, I thought how quiet it was in the office, and realized how much I was getting done, in a short amount of time. It never is like that at home. I can’t work on any project more than five minutes without a little voice asking me for something, or another little voice crying or making noises at me to get my attention. So it has been lovely. I am hoping I can start to work another half day for a few weeks in order to speed the training and learning curve along, so I’ll be able to work independently on Saturday’s. Since no one else would be in the office that day, I’d have to be up to speed. I am looking into some short-term childcare options.

Ryan adores his preschool. I think Auntie Mara left a comment where she wondered how long it would be before Ryan wanted to go two days. Well, it was exactly one time! He asks all the time now when he gets to go to school. This school runs in quarters, so after three months in November, we will have the option of continuing, and I am sure we will be adding another day- much to Ryan’s delight. He also has fun playing with two of his friends, both boys, who are right around his age. He said his friend, Leif, and him last week, pretended a train was a roller coaster. I am glad he is making friends and learning how to play with other kids his age.

Last week they took a “field trip” off the farm to an actual field (corn to be exact), where they picked an ear of corn, and then took it back to the farm and painted it. Ryan was so proud of it, and now it is displayed on our fireplace mantle. He also told me he got to walk in the mud! Ah-the life of a three-year-old boy!

If you have been reading my blog for a while, you know how we have struggled with getting Cole to sleep. About a month ago, we finally moved his crib out of our room and into Ryan’s room. Finally, he is sleeping so much better! I nurse him to sleep (around 8:30), and now instead of waking up every two to three hours, he’ll only usually wake up once now. Usually around 1am, sometimes 3am. Last week he was teething, so he woke up a few more times, but I nurse him for about 10 minutes, and he goes right back to sleep. I feel like a new woman, actually getting 5-7 hours of sleep now in a stretch instead of two.

I just had to share the picture below. It is good to keep your baby rear facing in their car seat as long as possible, even if they are over a year old and over 20 pounds, both of which Cole is. He finally outgrew sitting rear facing, so a few weeks ago, Joe turned his car seat around, and so he is forward facing now. He found these sunglasses while Joe was fitting the seat, and just had to wear them.

He really likes sitting forward facing. He takes his Crocs off, and rolls the window down with his toes. He thinks that is the coolest thing ever. He is just the sweetest little guy right now. He smiles almost the entire day, and he has developed dimples. Good thing he can’t talk, because if he asked me for anything with that smile, I know I wouldn’t be able to resist.

Activities Cole Little Pumpkin Sweet Pea Designs Ryan School Work

Our Week of “Firsts”

We have had three big “firsts” around here this week.

The first, first was Ryan’s first day of preschool on Tuesday. He woke up early with Joe, and when I got downstairs to him, I told him today was the day he got to go to school! He smiled and said, “Oh yes, and I’m ready to go!” How’s that for enthusiasm? Here is a picture of him ready to go, right before we left. (He loves his blue lunch box- and he is smiling not crying) 🙂

He was very excited as I dropped him off. We were pleased to find out that another little friend that he has in his music class, was also in Ryan’s class. As the parents were leaving, Ryan realized that I would be leaving too. I asked him if he was ready for me to leave, and he said yes.

Then he got his little stressed out look on his face, and came up to me, and gave me a long hug. I knew my little guy was trying so hard to be a big boy! I asked him again if he was ready for me to leave. He nodded again, and said yes. So Cole and I left. Surprisingly, I was fine- I know he was going to have fun, and be well taken care of.

Cole and I ran errands, and had a productive morning. We picked Ryan up at 12:30, and his class was eating lunch outside. Ryan saw me and said, “Hi Mom! We’re just eating some lunch here!” I asked him if he had fun and he said, “Yes, and I didn’t even cry!” That got a laugh from his teachers. As we were leaving, Ryan gave one of his teachers a hug, so I figured he bonded well with her.

It was kind of weird driving home, and asking Ryan what he did. For the first time in his life, I do not know what he did for a large period of time, and have to rely on his version of what he did. He told me the teachers played a game with him, and he got to play in the sandbox. He also made a name tag with farm stickers on the front, and his hand-print, with the date of his first day of school on the back. Here is a picture of his first art project from school:

Later in the day, he started citing a rhyme that I have never heard before. He told me he learned it at preschool. He also started walking like a duck, which he has never done before, so it will be interesting to see these next few weeks what new and exciting things he does. I have to say, that his first day, couldn’t have gone better. He wants to go back next week. Yea!

Our second first, was my baby, got his first haircut! I have been hesitant to cut it, because for some reason, it seems like once he gets his first haircut, that will make him into a little boy, not a baby anymore. I also love the fact that he had curls in the back of his head. He looked so cute.

Tuesday morning though, his hair was matted and it was hard to comb through, even though his hair had just been washed last night. Plus, there was hair in his ears. It was just getting to dang long. He was starting to look like a little dog that needed to be groomed, instead of a cute baby boy. 🙂 So here are the “before” pictures I took of his hair Tuesday morning: (the little cut on his chin, is the result of a fall on the cement last night at the park)

After Joe got home from work, we took him to get his first haircut:

He fussed and had a few tears, but no major screaming fest (unlike his older brother, who until recently, would rather give up Mac & Cheese -his favorite food-, then have his hair cut). It went well, and his stylist even gave some of his locks in an envelope. Here is the finished result!

I am very happy with how his hair turned out: he still looks somewhat like a baby (to me, anyway,) and the stylist kept some curl in the back. I tried to get a picture of the back of his head, but he would not cooperate!

Now for my shameless plug: if you like Cole’s shirt that he is wearing in the “after” pictures, it says, “What Happens At Grandma’s Stays At Grandma’s,” it is available in my on-line store, Little Pumpkin Sweet Pea Designs.

Cole even let Ryan play barber last night and comb his hair in the tub, and as it was drying. Ryan was combing it, and pretending to cut it. Cole was laughing, so maybe he’ll actually like getting his hair cut. I can hope at least!

Finally, the third first, is I started my first day at my new job on Wednesday. As I wrote in a previous post, I was offered a part time job, one day a week for now. It is at an accounting firm and I am doing bookkeeping and business management.

My first day went great, after I got over my nerves. It has been almost seven years since I started a “formal” job! The owner is really nice, and I will be working directly with her. I think I am really going to learn a lot from her. The other women in the office were really nice and helpful as well, and I know I’ll enjoy working there a lot.

Joe’s parents have graciously offered to watch Ryan and and Cole, while I am at work, and Grandma said everything went well there too. She said Cole only cried once, when she was trying to get him to sleep. When I arrived to pick them up, Cole smiled at me from the door, and then turned around to go back and play!

This was the longest we have ever been away from each other since he was born, and he just trotted off, like he had important things to get to. I nursed him for a few minutes, and then he slid off my lap, and immediately went back to sit on Grandma’s lap. I guess my ‘baby’ is becoming a little boy. I am very happy though, he did so well, had fun, and obviously bonded with Grandma. 🙂

Today, Ryan said he wanted to go back to Grandma’s “all day,” so he enjoyed himself too.

All and all, our “firsts” involved change and some nerves, but we all got through them, and are looking forward as these new changes, mesh into our lives in the upcoming months.

Cole Family & Friends Household Mothering Parenting Pregnancy & Birth Ryan Work

Am I Lucky?

WARNING

The post below is what it took for us to have me be a stay-at-home-mom. I know that isn’t everyone’s choice or circumstances. I am not judging anyone for their choices in this post- but it is my frank and honest thoughts, and experiences. I wanted to “warn” anyone who may have torn feelings about not being able to stay-at-home, what this post is about. I have listed some benefits, and observations on staying home that have been true for us. I don’t want to accidentally make anyone feel bad if they read this post, not knowing what it is about. If you are still interested in reading the post, please continue below. Thank you.

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We had a lot of family events this summer, where I constantly heard, “You are so lucky,” in response to the question you always get asked at parties: “What do you do?” Of course my answer was, “I’m a stay-at-home-mom.”

The first few times I heard “You are so lucky,” I nodded my head and agreed. However, once I kept hearing it over and over, I started to wonder, was I really lucky, and how do you define luck? Webster’s defines luck, lucky, and so forth as: 1: having good luck, 2: happening by chance, 3: producing or resulting in good by chance. It also says lucky stresses the agency of chance in bringing about a favorable result.

After reading these definitions, I decided that I am not lucky because I am a stay-at-home-mom. I know these people were just trying to be nice and make conversation, but the more I heard “You are so lucky,” the more annoyed I became. Obviously, luck is random. It is not something that you can plan for, and it usually just happens.

That is the total opposite of what and how Joe and I planned for our lives as parents. When we were dating, we both agreed wholeheartedly that we did not want to leave our children in daycare. We know some people don’t have an option, but at that point in time we did. That was a very important priority for us, so we planned our lives around this belief.

We didn’t spend beyond our means. We didn’t take elaborate vacations, building up debt. We both worked full-time jobs and tried to save as much as we could. We didn’t go out and buy every new electronic gadget that came out. We never charged anything that we couldn’t pay off that month. Both of our cars were older; I finally got a new car a few months after we found out I was pregnant with Ryan. We bought a year old used car, and my previous car by that time was 11 years old and had over 150k miles on it.

Joe worked his way through college after high school, lived at home, and he worked full-time. I wasn’t fortunate to go to college after high school, and didn’t start attending college until I was 25. I paid as I went, never taking out one student loan, because I didn’t want the obligation of being in debt for years. It took me 4 years of working full-time and attending school at night to complete an Associate’s degree, and I finished that when I was 8.5 months pregnant with Ryan. Not the educational path most choose to take. I do hope to complete my Bachelor’s degree one day, but in the meantime I have no student loans I have to pay back.

When Ryan was born, I was able to take four months off, and return to my job part-time. Joe’s schedule allowed him to be home when I went to work, so Joe watched Ryan when I was at work. In February 2005, my job ended when the company I worked for was sold. Thus, I entered into being a full time stay-at-home-mom. Did that all happen by chance? Was it just pure luck that I found myself unemployed, and didn’t need to rush right out and find another job, so we could make ends meet? Well no, frankly, Joe and I planned for this moment, and we lived our lives for six years, being able to achieve that plan.

As almost any family living on one income knows, it is hard. You have to be careful and watch your nickels and dimes. Not to say that Joe and I don’t spend money, because we do- we are planning on buying a new house in the near future, but for day-to-day, we watch what we spend it on, and try not to get sucked into the media’s version of what they tell us we need to be happy. We don’t need a new car every few years. We don’t need an iPod, or an iPhone. Yes, I would love new gadgets, but making those little choices on how to spend money today, allows us to keep the lifestyle that we value tomorrow.

So, when I hear, “You are lucky,” it bugs me. We are not lucky, but self-disciplined, and have made sacrifices so we can afford to have me stay at home. It was hard for me to give up Starbucks whenever I had the whim, getting my hair highlighted and cut every six weeks in a cushy salon. It was hard not buying new clothes, when I wouldn’t have thought twice about it when I was working (I like to shop), and new things for the house, when I stopped working, and we no longer had a dual income. It is hard when we have to shell out money for unexpected expenses that we haven’t planned on. It means we have to watch our money that much closer.

However, being at home and being with my babies right now, while they are young is priceless. No house, car, gadget, or vacation, can compare with knowing that we are doing what we feel is best for our children, which is my being home with them. My friend, Amy, wrote once on her blog something to the effect that she may have lots of regrets in her life, but she knows that choosing to stay home with her children will not be one of them. I echo that. Money, and material things only go so far. If I give up this precious time with my children to work full-time, I know one day, when they are grown up and gone, I will wonder what it would have been like to be at home with them, for this short window of time. I know I will regret it.

So I am not lucky that Joe and I planned and worked hard so that I could be a stay-at-home mother. However, I am fortunate, blessed, and thankful, that Joe and I had the foresight to realize years before we had children, that we wanted them to be at home with one of us. Not everyone realizes that, and when they do, they may not be able to work out circumstances to stay at home.

Having said all of this, I am lucky there are so many choices for stay at home mothers today. I am extremely fortunate that a very part-time job found me. Today, I go back to work one day a week, at an accounting firm. At some point it may work out where I can work a half-day as well on Saturday, and Joe will be able to watch the boys. Because of my wonderful in-laws who will be watching the boys, I was able to accept this opportunity that will allow me to keep my skills current, and to keep my foot in the door in my industry.

Joe and I talked about it a lot, and we feel because his parents are watching the boys, it was too good of an opportunity to pass on. The boys will still be with family, and we know they will still have the environment that we wanted for them. I get to have some hours every week where I am using what I already know, and learning more for my career. If and when we decide the time is right for me to increase the amount I work, like when the boys are in school, this firm has already told me I can do that. Ryan and Cole get to spend a full day every week with their grandparents, who they absolutely adore- who really are like second parents to them. I could not have asked for more. Now that is being lucky!

Attachment Parenting Family & Friends Work

Quick Update & Don’t Forget To Bid!

Post author By A Mama's Blog
Post date July 23, 2007

This is just a quick update to say I am still alive! 🙂 We had a fun weekend with my father-in-law’s 80th birthday party. I hope to have some pictures soon.

It has been terribly hot and humid here, so I haven’t felt like doing too much of anything, but I have a lot of bookkeeping I am trying to finish for my client this week, and I have to squeeze in quarter end books for the local chapter of my Attachment Parenting group, where I volunteer as its treasurer.

If you haven’t already checked out their big on-line auction, you still have time. It ends this Wednesday at 7 PM EASTERN TIME, and there are a lot of great items- from baby carriers to cloth diapers, to T-shirts for mom and baby, to week-end get-aways, available. There are many items that are still below retail value, so take a look, bid on something for yourself, or for your children, and know you will be helping a great cause at the same time!

So, until I finish my work, I probably won’t be blogging much. Thanks for checking in. Hope you can stay cool if you are having hot summer heat! 🙂

Cole Health Ryan Work

Curly Q Cole

Thanks for the inquires on Cole- after taking him to an urgent care center on Sunday (after he seemed worse on Sunday morning), he miraculously got better as soon as we left. Figures. Anyway, he was checked for an ear infection, and strep throat, and both were negative. The doctor said he probably had another virus, and there were a lot of them going around- in fact she had seen several babies Cole’s age all weekend with similar symptoms.

Today he was back to his old self for the most part, and after his bath tonight, I tried to get his hair to stay in a little curl mohawk. It did okay, until Ryan came up messed up his hair, saying, “I don’t like Coley’s hair like that!” He started to cry- who knew Cole’s hair was such a big deal, although I suspect it wasn’t that he didn’t like Cole’s hair, as much as he didn’t like the attention we were giving Cole. Here are some pictures of Cole’s curly hair, as he ate his snack:

In other news, I am working on the second quarter books for my very part-time job, and since that original post the job has changed, to me doing all of it at home, so that is nice, but I have to work at night, when the boys are asleep. So between that, swim lessons, and getting ready for the birthday party for my father-in-law this week, I probably won’t have too much time for blogging this week. But I’ll be back…. 🙂

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