Category: Mothering

Odds and Ends

I have left a few open-ended posts and events “out there” the last few weeks, so here is a wrap up, on all those issues.

For our fifth year anniversary, Joe and I both had such a busy week; it kind of snuck up on us. We realized we didn’t have a babysitter. My dad tried to rearrange his work schedule so he could baby sit at the last minute for us, but it didn’t work out. So we took the kids to the mall, where they got to play in the play area and at Pottery Barn Kids. Then we got pizza at California Pizza Kitchen.

So we had a nice night- it was kind of special to think back five years ago we were at our wedding and now we were sharing our special day with the two lil’ monkey’s we love the most- our little boys. 🙂 Ryan was interested in the wedding pictures I was putting on the blog, so I got to talk to him about our wedding.

We also passed a Crocs vendor in the mall, which had every size Crocs in every color imaginable. Cole loves trying on and walking around in Ryan’s Crocs, so we couldn’t resist any longer and picked him up his own pair in Peacock Blue- here is a picture of him the next day with his first pair of Crocs.

We also got the window repaired on my car. Our mechanic is wonderful, and we have had some issues in the past, where I bought the car in when something wasn’t working and they have fixed it for free! One time a vacuum hose was broken and the air conditioning was only blowing out of the defrost vent. So I knew a broken window regulator was going to cost, but it was almost $500 after parts and labor. Ouch. I feel like the mechanic is honest though, and I am sure we would have been charged at least this much, if not more anyplace else. Also, since they have fixed things free for us before, of course I wanted to give them the business. What are you going to do? I need a window, and the duct tape and hanger was giving out, after my drive to work. 🙂

Speaking of work, I absolutely love, love it. I love the work- stimulating, but not over my head, with variety. The other day while I was working, I thought how quiet it was in the office, and realized how much I was getting done, in a short amount of time. It never is like that at home. I can’t work on any project more than five minutes without a little voice asking me for something, or another little voice crying or making noises at me to get my attention. So it has been lovely. I am hoping I can start to work another half day for a few weeks in order to speed the training and learning curve along, so I’ll be able to work independently on Saturday’s. Since no one else would be in the office that day, I’d have to be up to speed. I am looking into some short-term childcare options.

Ryan adores his preschool. I think Auntie Mara left a comment where she wondered how long it would be before Ryan wanted to go two days. Well, it was exactly one time! He asks all the time now when he gets to go to school. This school runs in quarters, so after three months in November, we will have the option of continuing, and I am sure we will be adding another day- much to Ryan’s delight. He also has fun playing with two of his friends, both boys, who are right around his age. He said his friend, Leif, and him last week, pretended a train was a roller coaster. I am glad he is making friends and learning how to play with other kids his age.

Last week they took a “field trip” off the farm to an actual field (corn to be exact), where they picked an ear of corn, and then took it back to the farm and painted it. Ryan was so proud of it, and now it is displayed on our fireplace mantle. He also told me he got to walk in the mud! Ah-the life of a three-year-old boy!

If you have been reading my blog for a while, you know how we have struggled with getting Cole to sleep. About a month ago, we finally moved his crib out of our room and into Ryan’s room. Finally, he is sleeping so much better! I nurse him to sleep (around 8:30), and now instead of waking up every two to three hours, he’ll only usually wake up once now. Usually around 1am, sometimes 3am. Last week he was teething, so he woke up a few more times, but I nurse him for about 10 minutes, and he goes right back to sleep. I feel like a new woman, actually getting 5-7 hours of sleep now in a stretch instead of two.

I just had to share the picture below. It is good to keep your baby rear facing in their car seat as long as possible, even if they are over a year old and over 20 pounds, both of which Cole is. He finally outgrew sitting rear facing, so a few weeks ago, Joe turned his car seat around, and so he is forward facing now. He found these sunglasses while Joe was fitting the seat, and just had to wear them.

He really likes sitting forward facing. He takes his Crocs off, and rolls the window down with his toes. He thinks that is the coolest thing ever. He is just the sweetest little guy right now. He smiles almost the entire day, and he has developed dimples. Good thing he can’t talk, because if he asked me for anything with that smile, I know I wouldn’t be able to resist.

Breastfeeding Mothering Pregnancy & Birth

Can You Help La Leche League Group in NY?

Post author By A Mama's Blog
Post date September 17, 2007
1 Comment on Can You Help La Leche League Group in NY?

I recently was contacted by a La Leche League leader, Whitney, in New York, who told me La Leche League of New York West is planning an area conference (for October 5-7 in Grand Island, New York).

They are holding a silent auction fundraiser at this conference and they need silent auction items. They will be acknowledging all auction donors in their conference booklet. They will also display company-marketing materials next to any donations they receive for the auction. Whitney said they are expecting between 100-200 women plus their partners and children to participate.

I absolutely adore the LLL-I have found so many helpful articles on their website when I have had breastfeeding, issues, problems, or questions. Furthermore, their book, “The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding,” is just a wonderful resource for anyone who has questions about nursing, or who is planning to nurse, and just needs to know where to begin. It also has great troubleshooting solutions in it, and I think of this book as my “bible” for nursing.

So, I was very happy to donate a breastfeeding shirt, and bumper sticker from my on-line shop, Little Pumpkin Sweet Pea Designs for their auction.

If you can donate any items to this group, I know they would appreciate it. You can contact the La Leche League leader, Whitney, by e-mail. She can give you all the details. But please hurry, because Whitney needs to receive all donations in the next couple of weeks, if you want to be recognized in the conference booklet.

If you think you can help, that is great, and I know they thank you in advance. It is for a wonderful cause. Every nursing mother (or mother-to-be thinking about nursing), needs support, and the LLL is always there. Now there is a simple way to give back to a local chapter of this wonderful organization! 🙂

Breastfeeding Current Events Mothering

Nursing Mother / Doctor-To-Be Denied Time To Pump

Post author By A Mama's Blog
Post date September 13, 2007
7 Comments on Nursing Mother / Doctor-To-Be Denied Time To Pump

This story was brought to my attention today. I am so shocked and disappointed in this board’s decision they will not allow this mother, Sophie, extra time for pumping breaks during her nine hour medical exam. She has a four-month old daughter, who is nursing- like Sophie said, what is she supposed to do? Let her milk drip all over the computer? Here’s another story on the issue:

BOSTON — Sophie Currier is a breast-feeding mother of two who has just completed an MD-Ph.D. program at Harvard University.Before she can have the doctor-scientific research career she’s dreamed of she must pass a nine-hour medical licensing exam scheduled for next week. But the National Board of Medical Examiners is refusing to let her have the extra time she needs to pump breast milk every
three hours in order to avoid serious medical complications.

“Because it’s physically impossible for a nursing mom to go nine hours or nine and a half hours without expressing milk, I told them that they were putting me in a position of choosing between nursing my child and taking this exam and advancing my career,” Currier said.

Currier has already overcome serious obstacles in her life — dyslexia and attention deficit hyperactivity disorder. To fight this obstacle, she is suing the licensing board, alleging discrimination.

“I think that it’s actually discriminating against women because men don’t have to do this job. No male will ever have to face this problem of deciding between feeding their child and taking an exam,” Currier said.

An attorney for the board said, “We can’t have an ad hoc preference for Sophie Currier. It wouldn’t be fair to others taking the test or to the public.”

But Currier said one of the things that bothers her the most is what she calls the hypocrisy of the board’s position.

“The medical community is putting a huge effort out — or portions of the medical community — to encourage women to breastfeed. If we are to breastfeed we need to be accommodated to do so,” Currier said.

Currier said that she hopes that a federal judge will simply order the board to give her additional break time beyond the total 45 minutes the rules now allow.

Sophie is so right on all of this, especially the hypocrisy found in the medical community in regards to breastfeeding. It isn’t like she is going to going to go into the bathroom and look up answers to her exam on her laptop- she’ll be pumping her breasts! Furthermore, as any woman who has nursed knows, when you can’t nurse, and don’t pump, at the very least you become engorged, uncomfortable, and can experience pain. As if the exam wasn’t hard enough, she would have to divert some of her attention away from her test, and be worried about this.

When the attorney for the board says extra breaks wouldn’t be fair to others or the public, then offer everyone extra breaks, and how is it not fair to the public?- Give me a break! Nursing your baby is one of the best things a mother can do for her baby, for society, and for the public!

I also think Sophie hits the nail on the head when she mentions men will never have to be faced w/ this issue. I can’t help but think if men breastfed, there would be nursing lounges in every restaurant, public place, breastfeeding breaks at work & school, and of course they would grant as many breaks as needed during exams to pump. Men would never be forced into a bathroom stall to pump during their breaks, and lunch hours, for fear of being “found out,” and being discriminated against because they are breastfeeding their baby.

It is sad so many women STILL have to fight so hard just to do what is natural and what is best for their babies. Even though great strides have been made in accepting breastfeeding in our culture, stories like this remind us, there is still a long way to go until women won’t have to choose between feeding their babies and their career, or have to resort to a lawsuit to ensure they can breastfeed.

I am glad she is challenging the ruling- it is only because of women like her that changes and progress are made!

Cole Family & Friends Mothering Parenting Ryan

Happy Grandparent’s Day!

Nobody can do for little children what grandparents do. Grandparents sort of sprinkle stardust over the lives of little children. ~Alex Haley

Today is Grandparent’s Day, so I wanted to devote a post to grandparents!

First off, even though I didn’t know my only grandmother, Mimi, when I was growing up, we have gotten acquainted over the years, and she is terrific! She is so smart, loves to read, and lets all of her family descend on her beautiful beach house every summer. She lovingly provides a place, where all of us stressed out, sleep deprived, visitors can come each year to relax, just be, and take a step back.

After having five of her own children, eleven grandchildren, and four great-grandchildren, there isn’t anything she doesn’t know about babies. She helped put a piece of the puzzle together for me on Cole’s constant waking at night this summer- she told me he was hungry and I needed to give him a protein snack before bed, and don’t forget to do it! I usually did forget, but have been remembering and he DOES sleep so much better now. Sometimes it is just the simple things grandparents can remind us of that make all the difference. So thank you, Mimi, for everything you do for ALL of us. We love you!

I also didn’t know my only grandpa growing up. He has taken more and more trips out to our state to visit, and we have gotten to know him better as well. He is wickedly funny, and witty. I am so glad that I have these memories of him, and he has been able to at least meet his oldest great-grand son!

Second, I can’t thank Ryan and Cole’s grandparents enough- all five of them, for the incredible love, help, and support they give to our entire family. I honestly don’t know how we would have made it this far without their help.

It seems like just when Joe and I, are at the end of our ropes, whoo-la- a grandparent calls and offers to have Ryan over for the day (Joe’s parents), or offers to come up and baby-sit for a few hours (my dad and step-mom), or stops by for a short visit, playing with the boys for half an hour, to give me a break (my dad), or listens to me rant and rave, and vent (my mom) never judging me, but giving me practical and loving advice, so I can keep going.

In those early days after having Cole, who demanded I was with him at all times, the grandparents were lifesavers, in helping me with Ryan, so he still felt special, and also helping me with Cole- holding him, so I could take a shower, or just get a break.

Whenever my well is dry, these incredible people are waiting in the wings to help re-nourish my supply. I gain a lot of comfort in knowing we have such a wonderful support system, but at the same time, allowing me to find my path as a mother.

I am not naïve to think I am a great mother, or even a good mother- I am just trying to do the best I can, but any good things I do as a mother is because of the love, and extra support my mother, Joe’s parents, and my parents offer to me. I would not be half the mother I try to be without their love, support, and guidance.

Becoming a mother involves so many changes and unexpected twists and turns. I didn’t grow up with grandparents, so I didn’t understand that special relationship-not only between the grandparents and grandchildren, but a new dimension to my relationships with my parents and in-laws. I never expected to need or have these relationships- and now I couldn’t imagine it any other way.

My boys love their grandparents so much, who light up every time they are around you. They have a special sparkle in their eyes that they have only for you, which I hope one day I’ll be able to see in my grandchildren’s eyes as well.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart, Grandparents, for everything you do for us every day. It means more than you could possibly ever know. I love all of you!

Here are some special quotes regarding grandparents that I like. The quote at the top of this post by Alex Haley, is my favorite. Happy Grandparents Day to all!

Perfect love sometimes does not come until the first grandchild. ~Welsh Proverb

What children need most are the essentials that grandparents provide in abundance. They give unconditional love, kindness, patience, humor, comfort, lessons in life. And, most importantly, cookies. ~Rudolph Giuliani

Grandmas hold our tiny hands for just a little while, but our hearts forever. ~Author Unknown

It is as grandmothers that our mothers come into the fullness of their grace. ~Christopher Morley

Grandchildren are God’s way of compensating us for growing old. ~Mary H. Waldrip

The best baby-sitters, of course, are the baby’s grandparents. You feel completely comfortable entrusting your baby to them for long periods, which is why most grandparents flee to Florida. ~Dave Barry

A mother becomes a true grandmother the day she stops noticing the terrible things her children do because she is so enchanted with the wonderful things her grandchildren do. ~Lois Wyse

Grandparents are there to help the child get into mischief they haven’t thought of yet. ~Gene Perret

It’s amazing how grandparents seem so young once you become one. ~Author Unknown

Grandchildren: the only people who can get more out of you than the IRS. ~Gene Perret

If your baby is “beautiful and perfect, never cries or fusses, sleeps on schedule and burps on demand, an angel all the time,” you’re the grandma. ~Teresa Bloomingdale

What is it about grandparents that is so lovely? I’d like to say that grandparents are God’s gifts to children. And if they can but see, hear and feel what these people have to give, they can mature at a fast rate. ~Bill Cosby

No cowboy was ever faster on the draw than a grandparent pulling a baby picture out of a wallet. ~Author Unknown

A grandmother pretends she doesn’t know who you are on Halloween. ~Erma Bombeck

Cole Family & Friends Household Me Mothering Parenting Ryan

Five Years Ago Today

Five years ago today, Joe and I were married. All of my wedding pictures are in storage right now, so I took a picture of the two pictures we have in the house of our wedding. Interestingly, the photographer told us our wedding was the last wedding he was shooting with traditional 35mm film- after our wedding he was upgrading to digital. I remember thinking that sounded so technologically advanced, and never thought I would have a digital camera- how things can change in only five years.

Yes, how things can change in five years. Looking back at our wedding day, it almost seems like it was another lifetime ago! At times it seems like that our lives five years ago was the “calm before the storm,” and the “storm” being the wonderful two children we are blessed to have. Some of the obvious big differences between our lives in September 2002 and September 2007-

2002: I was a compulsive neat freak.

2007: Now if there is a teeny, tiny path, through my house, which I can walk through without stepping on a toy, I think my house is clean enough.

2002: Three loads of laundry a week was a lot.

2007: If I don’t have three loads of laundry a day, it has been a “light” day- (no one threw up, or covered themselves in jelly, dirt, mud, etc.)

2002: I thought tired meant not getting 8 hours of sleep. I actually have a degree in floral design (a new fact about me!), and I did the flowers for our wedding. I stayed up until 4am the Thursday night into Friday morning doing them. I got up around 9 or 10 the next morning- the day before the wedding, and I was just dragging all day.

2007: Getting five or six hours of sleep at a time is a GOOD, FULL night of sleep. I don’t plan on getting 8 hours of sleep in a row until the boys move out.

2002: Joe and I go out every weekend- usually starting around 8pm on Friday night for dinner, and a movie. Who cares if it was the late movie? We could sleep in as late as we wanted on Saturday.

2007: At 8pm Joe is usually giving the boys a bath, while I am doing the bedtime prep for Ryan and Cole. We have eaten hours ago; in fact when we go out to dinner now, we are usually eating with the senior citizens at the early bird special, because our kids like their dinner at 5.

Sleeping in on Saturday means 7am IF Ryan decides to sleep that late. Otherwise he wakes us up at 6:30, telling Dad especially he needs to get up and make him waffles.

2002: Joe and I had time for dates and quiet dinners at our favorite restaurants, sometimes with family and or friends.

2007: A date now is dinner with the kids at Noodles, and the only time we see friends is if I run into another Mom I know at Noodles, while she is trying to juggle her kids and food! Quiet dinner- yea right! I guess if neither boy is talking, screaming, laughing, crying, or banging their silverware against the table for more than 10 seconds that would count.

2002: I thought my life was complete- children would only add to it.

2007: My children are my life- I could not have imagined how much I love them- not only do they add so much each and every day, they are the best of Joe and I.

2002: I didn’t think I could love my husband more than on our wedding day.

2007: I love my husband more than on our wedding day. He is the best father I could have hoped and dreamed of for my children. I never considered my love would grow for him, when he became a father.

2002: I thought I was so fortunate to be marrying Joe, who I loved with all my heart. I thought I was pretty lucky!

2007: I am so fortunate to be married to a man, who I still love. Even when we are stressed, sleep deprived, and argue, we always manage to make-up, and get back to where we are “okay.”

Happy Anniversary!