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Cancer Health Me Mothering

Mini Break from Blogging

I am going to be taking a short “vacation” from blogging.  My cancer recovery is not going as fast as I had hoped, and right now I have to concentrate on resting and trying to heal.

I appreciate the e-mails so many thyroid cancer patients have sent me- those who have already been through it, and those who have just been newly diagnosed and have questions.  Feel free to send me an e-mail if you have any questions (my e-mail is on my Contact Me page),  and  I will respond to you as soon as  I can.

I have also archived all my cancer posts in the right hand side bar under “cancer” so you can read about my experience  and what I have learned so far, and hopefully you may find some answers to your questions in some of those posts. 

I am hoping my mini blogging break will be short lived, and I will be able to blog again in the very near future.  Right now though I need to concentrate on healing and getting my body ready for the radioactive iodine treatment it needs.

If you follow me on Twitter, I will try to post short updates there on how I am doing- that is much easier right now than writing a blog post, and of course if you are a Facebook friend I will see you around there.

As a final note for now, PLEASE have your health care provider check your thyroid at your annual exam.  If anything feels “off” get in for an ultrasound as soon as you can.  That saved me from having to have my neck totally dissected to remove the lymph nodes that the cancer had spread to.  My surgeon credited my nurse practitioner who caught it early and insisted I have an ultrasound.  In my opinion, I don’t think there is enough information out there informing women of thyroid cancer.

Thanks again for all the support you all have given me during this process.  I will be back stronger and healthier, and will share the rest of my thyroid cancer experience.  Cancer can happen to anyone- please take care of yourselves and follow up with anything you or your health care provider thinks is abnormal.

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Cancer Health Me

The Biopsy that Wasn’t

Friday was my scheduled biopsy.  Except someone failed to tell the doctor.  I’ll explain.

If you have been following this in my other posts, then you remember that after I had an ultrasound, and they found a nodule,  my doctor told me I needed to have a biopsy.  This is to check for cancer.  She referred me and sent my file to an ear, nose, and throat (ENT) doctor, Dr. S., in town.  I called and specifically told the receptionist that I needed a biopsy.  She told me they had received my file, and they were going to fit me in right away for the biopsy, since I had a nodule.  My sister, Mara took off work, so she could accompany me to the doctor, and the boys’ grandmother graciously babysat.

We arrived at the doctor’s office and I filled out all the paperwork.  Then we went back to the exam room, and waited for the doctor. When he arrived, he started going over my medical history.  He asked me a lot of questions about my health in general.   Then he pulled out a booklet and started explaining what the thyroid does, and what having a nodule means.  I had a hard time focusing because I was wondering when he was going to start the biopsy. 

He told me  in my case, a biopsy is needed, but an ultrasound-guided biopsy at the hospital will give me the most accurate results.  It hit me that I was not going to have a biopsy on Friday.  About that time Mara asked if he was going to do the biopsy.  He said he could do one with the needle in his office, but without the ultrasound, the results might not be very accurate. 

I really wanted to get this done and over with already. I was tempted to tell him to just do it.  But, no matter what the results were, I would have that question in the back of my mind- could I trust the results?  I decided since I have to have it done anyway, I might as well make sure it is the most accurate it can be.  So that means scheduling it at the hospital for the ultrasound led biopsy.

As we left the office, I was really annoyed and mad.  I couldn’t believe the doctor’s office failed to tell me this was a consult only.  I was also annoyed because now this means more waiting.  I just want to get this behind me, one way or another.  I tried calling the hospital all afternoon on Friday, to get the biopsy scheduled,  but no one ever answered the phone!  I was beyond frustrated.  I can’t control it though, so I will have to just go with the flow.

The only silver lining, was I got a lot of my questions answered.  The doctor told me after the biopsy, I should have results within 3-5 days.   He also told me if there is cancer, they remove the entire thyroid.  He says it isn’t worth the risk to just cut out the cancerous portion- the entire thyroid is removed.  So I would be facing surgery.  Then I would be on medication for the rest of my life.  He actually increased the percentage of cases where it is cancer- to 15%.  I had been told 10% previously. 

Dr. S. told me if the nodule is benign, then I can decide to just leave it, but they would watch it very closely to make sure it didn’t become cancerous, which I can only assume more biopsies.  He said sometimes patients decide to just have the benign part cut out, so they don’t have to worry about it becoming cancerous.  That would mean surgery.  He said they would still monitor the thyroid, but not as much.  He said even when the biopsy shows the nodule is benign, and a patient opts to have the benign part removed, they will examine the nodule, and sometimes still find traces of cancer.  He said if that happened, they would remove the thyroid at that point too. 

I don’t like the way most of these options end.  It sounds like nothing is for certain- even if the biopsy shows the nodule is benign- cancer could still be a possibility at some point.  This information is preparing me for the choice I will soon have to make.  Dr. S. told me my ultrasound showed some abnormalities, but he couldn’t make a diagnosis from just the ultrasound.  He also said when the nodule measures more than 3 centimeters, they become very concerned.  He said my nodule measured 1.7 centimeters.  For some reason that sounded reassuring- like I don’t have this awful mass on my thyroid growing. 

Dr. S. told me his own wife had thyroid cancer two years ago.  She had asked him to be his surgeon, and he said she was fine today.  He said thyroid cancer is very treatable, and is very slow growing. He told me it is the slowest growing cancer, and if I had to have cancer, this was the one to have. 

Obviously, I don’t want any cancer.  I don’t want to be treated.  I don’t want surgery. I don’t want to have to take medication for the rest of my life.  But  I also have two little boys to think about, who need their mommy healthy for the next 18 years.  So whatever the result is, I will process it, and make a decision. In the mean time I am going to read up on diet, and more natural things I can incorporate into my life- I figure it can’t hurt, and I will be taking a more proactive roll in my health. 

Thanks again for all the healing and positive e-mails and comments. I appreciate them so much.   As always- I will keep you posted.

**************************UPDATE*******************************

4-13-09

The hospital just called me back, and can fit me in this Wednesday afternoon.  I am glad the biopsy will be sooner than later.  Now if I can just stay calm between now and then.  🙂

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Cancer Health Me Mothering Parenting

Results from Ultrasound

Despite us having a major blizzard in Colorado, my doctor, Dr. T., was at work and called me with the results of the ultrasound on my thyroid today.

She said the ultrasound confirmed there is a nodule on the left part of my thyroid, as she suspected.  The doctor at the hospital, who read the ultrasound, suggests that I have a biopsy on the nodule to determine if it is cancerous or not. 

Dr. T. said nine times out of ten, it is nothing- it is like a benign cyst.  She also said they would be looking for anything atypical that would suggest the startings of something cancerous.  Dr. T. is sending my file to an ear, nose, and throat doctor in town, and as soon as he gets my file I will get the biopsy scheduled- I am hoping it can be as soon as next week.  I didn’t think to ask how long after the biopsy they would have results, but I am sure it can’t be more than a few days. 

I didn’t want to hear any of this.  I was wishing Dr. T. was going to say it was nothing- I just had an odd shaped thyroid.  But, since that isn’t the case, I have to take the next step.  I know it is for my health and the odds are in my favor.  Yet, I am terrified in that little place in the back of my mind.  Someone has to be that one person who isn’t okay.  Of course I hope that isn’t me, but what if it is? 

I can’t even really go there mentally right now.  Friends and family tell me not to assume the worst.  But when you are a mother, (or a father) it is so hard. How do you look at your precious children, and not wonder if you will be healthy for them?  How am I going to explain this to a five year old and a two-and-a-half year old if it comes down to that?  

I have way more questions than answers now, and all I can do is keep taking the steps to lead me to the point where I will have the answers I need. I just hope and pray they are the answers I am hoping for- that I am one of the nine, instead of that one.

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Health Me

Thyroid Ultrasound

In January I mentioned that my doctor, Dr. T.,  found what she thinks is a nodule on my thyroid.   She wanted me to have an ultrasound then to explore it further, but since my blood work came back fine, she told me I could wait eight weeks, and she would check it again.

I went last week for the follow up visit, and I was bummed that the nodule was still there.  Dr. T.  said it felt about the same, and she ordered strongly suggested that I have the ultrasound as soon as possible.  She told me she didn’t want to scare me, but she just had two women patients in the last month, who were in their 20’s who had thyroid cancer.  She said she had felt the same type of abnormality on their thyroid as she was feeling on mine. 

Before I freaked out, Dr. T. told me to relax (easier said than done), and nine times out of ten, it is nothing.  She said it could be stress, an odd shaped thyroid, or a harmless bump.  Dr. T. said we had to find out though- this was not something that could be ignored, and in good conscience, she had to tell me that it could be something more serious.

Of course I know it is stress related. I haven’t even allowed myself to think that it could be cancer- that happens to other people.  I have my ultrasound tomorrow- Wednesday afternoon, and I should know something by Friday-hopefully sooner.

As I sit here finishing up our taxes, I find my mind wandering to that place I don’t want it to go- to the what-if’s.  What if  this isn’t just stress, an odd shaped thyroid, or a harmless bump?  What if I am the third person my doctor has found thyroid cancer in?  What am I going to do? 

I hope I don’t have to answer these questions, and my heart goes out to everyone who has had to answer them.  I never thought much about it, until that other person could be me. 

Please send any healing thoughts you can my way, and I appreciate all the support I have received from my family and friends.  I will be sure to write an update once I know.

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Activities Cole Family & Friends Health Household Mothering Parenting Ryan

Why I Haven’t Been Blogging

Yes, I am still alive!  I think this is the longest I have gone with out updating my blog- an entire week. 

I have good reason though:

  • My sister, Vanessa, was in town for a visit, and we spent a lot of time together
  • I have been working another half-day at work
  • I have been trying to learn all the features on my NEW  red Blackberry Pearl 8110 cell phone ( I love it. I can’t believe I waited so long to upgrade)
  • I’m working on my New Year’s goal of  trying to keep the house organized and clutter free- it takes time, believe it or not
  • I’ve been reading more (actual books– not blogs)
  • I’ve been spending more time with my family

We did a few fun things while Vanessa was in town. We had a sister-night-out, a night at my dad’s, where he made his delicious Mexican food, and on Monday night, we took the boys to Casa Bonita.  They had so much fun, and I have pictures, but I’m too tired tonight to upload them.  I will write more about the boys’ and their cousin Maelin’s first visit to Casa Bonita soon. 

I also received some good news from my doctor.  She said my blood work came back fine and normal.  She said I could wait 4-6 weeks and have my thyroid checked again.  She said if it was still enlarged, then it would be very important to have the ultrasound.  So hopefully in the next few weeks, it will return back to normal.  I was happy to hear that.

I am learning to appreciate the good things that happen every day.  Some days it can take longer to find something good, but it is always there.  🙂

Stay tuned for the Casa Bonita recap- coming soon.  🙂