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Cole Fun Stuff Little Pumpkin Sweet Pea Designs Mothering My On-Line Store: Little Pumpkin Sweet Pea Designs Ryan Shopping

Welcome to A Mama’s Blog’s New Site!

Welcome to A Mama’s Blog’s new home.  I hope you can linger for a moment and get acquainted with the new site.  If you are looking for any past articles, just scroll down on the right hand side bar, and you can use the “Search” feature, or look through the “Archives.”  You can also browse through past posts by “Category”.  

Perhaps you have noticed a brand new feature, the “Link to Me” button, with the jibberish code underneath it.  You can now place a link on your blog using this code, and my button will appear on your blog.  I did this with my friend Amy’s Crunchy Domestic Goddess blog button in my blogroll.

Finally, my favorite feature so far is the header.  I searched and searched for the image that was perfect, and couldn’t find it.  I really wanted an image that reflected me with my boys, but it didn’t seem like they had an image with two boys and a mama that I liked.   I took a few days off from searching, and when I went back to look through the thousands of images istockphoto has,  a new one popped up.  A mama with her two boys, just about the same age as my boys! 

My designer, Heather,  from Girly Blog Designz customized it more for me, so it would look even more like Ryan, Cole, and I, and she added the laptop in for me.   Really, because what blogging mama doesn’t have her laptop with her at all times?  🙂  Then we found a landscape picture background that Heather merged into the picture.  Next Heather added her creative flair, and we finally had the header.  Needless to say, I am so happy with how the new blog turned out!

I am so happy and excited to be launching the new home of A Mama’s Blog, that I am giving away this best selling infant/toddler T-shirt from my store, Little Pumpkin Sweet Pea Designs:

what-happens-at-grandmas-copy1.jpg

It says, What Happens at Grandma’s Stays at Grandma’s.  The shirt is white (as pictured) and it is infant/toddler size 18 months.  You can view all the specifics of the shirt, see a size chart, and see it in greater detail here, at my store.

To win, all you have to do is leave a comment on this post.  If you have a blog, I’d really appreciate it, if you would mention and link this contest, and my new site in a post on your blog.  Please sign Mr. Linky if you do link.  I will pick a winner through random.org on Saturday March 22nd, at 10pm eastern time.  I will announce the winner either Saturday night, or on Sunday March 23rd.   So make sure you leave your post before then,  if you want a chance to win this adorable shirt. 

Even if you don’t have a child in size 18 months, it would make a great gift for your niece, nephew, grandchild, best friend’s baby…you get the drift.  Since this shirt is unisex, it is so cute for either a boy or a girl!

Thanks for stopping by the new site.  Don’t forget to check back to see who the T-shirt winner is. 

Categories
Cole Current Events Health Mothering Parenting Pregnancy & Birth Ryan

Vaccines, Autism, & Government Liability

Cross-posted at BlogherAn excerpt from Attorney Daily:   “Government health officials have conceded that childhood vaccines worsened a rare, underlying ailment that in due course led to autism-like symptoms in a Georgia girl, and that she should be rewarded from a federal vaccine-injury fund.”This story has also been in the newspapers and on the news.  While I don’t believe that vaccines cause autism in every child, or the reason a child is autistic is because of vaccines, I do believe vaccines can harm children that may have other factors going on with them, like the above case. 

 

I don’t think there is a “one size fits all” for every child, when it comes to vaccinations.  While some babies and children can tolerate the recommended vaccination schedule by the American Academy of Pediatrics, I think it is becoming very obvious to many parents that this may not be the best schedule for their child.

In our case, I did not see the need for my babies– at birth- to have a Hepatitis B vaccination.  Hepatitis B is a blood borne disease.  It can only be contracted by coming in contact with an infected person’s blood, or by sexual contact.  Since Ryan and Cole would be at home with me full-time, the risk was extremely low, that our newborns would be coming in contact with a Hep. B infected person’s blood.  Hepatitis B can live and survive on dried blood for about a week.  As Ryan got older, the probability increased that he could come in contact with dried blood- still not likely, but more probable than when he was a newborn.  At this point we decided to have him vaccinated for Hepatitis B.  We will do the same with Cole when he gets older.  Both our boys are on a delayed immunization schedule. 

I firmly believe that all the vaccines that are recommended for such small babies and children, could harm them. It may not show up as autism, but it could magnify itself as a behavior problem or even allergies.  I read an article not too long ago, which said there was some research being conducted which was trying to see if there was a link between allergies and vaccines. The thought was when a newborn and children under the age of 2 or so, are subjected to so many vaccinations, many mixed together, (MMR for example), it overwhelms the child’s underdeveloped immune system.  Since the child’s system is so busy fighting and making antibodies to these vaccines, something has to give, and it can’t fight off the common triggers for allergies. 

Whether this link will be shown or not, it does make sense to me in the fact that how can we expect a baby’s immune system which isn’t developed, to be able to fight off all the vaccines and allergen triggers they are exposed to? 

I also find it disturbing that so many of the vaccines are mixed together.  I suppose this is done so the baby only has to have one shot, but given that there is so much that is still unknown about what happens when vaccines are mixed together, there should at least be the option for parents to have their children receive only one vaccine at a time.  I would rather have my baby get another shot, than be increasing his chances of developing autism. 

I learned first hand that in this day and age, that isn’t even an option, we were holding out immunizing Ryan for measles, mumps, and rubella (MMR).  A lot of the research I had done had stated numerous children have had problems right after receiving this vaccine.  Some within 24 hours of having it, started displaying autistic symptoms.  Numerous more suffered bad reactions and had several days of high fevers, vomiting, and other problems.

After doing more research on the measles and mumps rates in my area, I learned there was only one case of measles in my area within the last two years, and two cases of mumps.  The measles case was in a child that had been adopted from a foreign country.  Rubella (German measles) are only contracted by females.  It just seemed ridiculous that we could be possibly jeopardizing our son’s health with serious consequences for diseases that were not a problem in our area. When I asked Ryan’s doctor at the time why boys need to be immunized for rubella, (even though they can never contract it), he said it was to protect pregnant women.  Rubella can be devastating to a pregnant woman’s baby. 

Before I got pregnant for the first time, I got immunized for rubella (I didn’t know for sure if I ever had been vaccinated for it).  I was told to wait three months before trying to become pregnant, and that was that.  Why are we possibly compromising our children’s health and giving them immunizations to protect adults, who should be capable of being immunized later in life for rubella?  What are the chances an infected female child with rubella would come in contact with a pregnant woman and infect her, (assuming they weren’t family members?)  It seems like this is overkill for situations that have low probabilities of happening in the first place.  When was the last time you heard of a pregnant woman’s baby being harmed from rubella by an un-vaccinated girl?  When was the last time you heard of or know of a child who was diagnosed with autism, Asperger syndrome, or severe allergies? 

Back to the MMR vaccine.  We wanted to delay this vaccine for as long as possible when a mumps outbreak occurred in my county.  Mumps can cause sterility in boys, in severe cases, and we were concerned.  I thought I could just call my doctor at the time and ask for the mumps vaccines, bypassing the measles and rubella ones.  WRONG.

You would have thought I had called and asked for a Nobel Prize winner in medicine to develop a new vaccine, available only for Ryan.  It took the nurse two days to call me back after asking me why in the world I would want just the mumps vaccine- didn’t I know about the MMR vaccine?  She said she had to “check into it.”  She finally told me that they don’t make just a mumps vaccine by itself, not in the MR mix.  A few of my friends were also concerned and one of my friends said her doctor (who is now our doctor) could order just the mumps vaccine, but it only came in large quantities and he would have to order the entire case.  He said if we could come up with about 25 kids who only wanted the mumps vaccine he would order it, but otherwise it was not profitable for him to do it.

I understand where he was coming from.  This doctor is a single practice, and he does have to watch his costs.  But the first place was a large clinic in town.  I had seen 25 kids in the waiting room every time I went there.  Surely, they would have other parents who only wanted a mumps vaccine.  I was furious that they wouldn’t order just the mumps vaccine.  I called them back and asked them again about this, and the bottom line was they just didn’t want to do that, and said the mumps vaccine needed to be given with the measles and rubella vaccine, and their doctors were not interested in giving separate mumps vaccines.

Needless to say, this was just ridiculous.  From the moment I saw Ryan, and Cole, I let my instincts guide me.  They have not been wrong yet.  Something just tells me all these vaccines can’t be good for their systems when they are so young.  Even though I don’t need “proof” from the government that vaccines can be harmful, it does reinforce that when you listen to your instincts as a parent, you are usually right.

I hope this case today helps parents, who have children with autism or any other vaccine injuries in the future.  I hope it gives other parents food for thought.  Just because something is recommended by your doctor, the government, the pediatric associations, or anyone else, etc. you don’t have to do it, if it feels wrong.  Trust your instincts. 

Categories
Activities Cole Mothering Ryan Shopping

Mall Rats

I did something today that I have never done before.  I spent 5 hours at the mall with both Ryan and Cole.  What was I thinking?

After our great weather on Saturday, it turned windy, cold, and snowy on Sunday.  We were cooped up all day yesterday.   I actually had no errands or anything else planned today, and the prospect of spending 12 hours in the house again, was not appealing- evidently going to the mall with two small, active, boys was. 

I had to return a pair of my new jeans that I just bought, because (and I’m not complaining), they were too big.  After having them on for a few hours, they stretched out, and just didn’t fit.  I also needed to pick up a few more casual / work shirts.  I couldn’t believe how empty the mall was.  It seems like I usually go to the mall on weekends.  There was hardly anyone there.  It was so nice being able to shop and look around without bumping into people, especially since I had the double stroller.  Ryan and Cole also liked being able to stand in front of the mirrors and they could move their arms, and not hit anyone.  I must remember any shopping at the mall needs to be done on a Monday.

I returned my jeans, (the size down didn’t fit at all), and I found some nice shirts on sale at Gap and Old Navy- woo hoo!  After I was done with my errands, we ate lunch.  I packed some PB&J’s for the boys.  Cole wanted nothing to do with his sandwich, so he ate most of my sandwich I picked up at Subway.  Oh well. 

Then we went to Pottery Barn Kids, where I took a nap on the beautifully, perfect, made up Madeline Canopy trundle bed, (do adults with jobs even have beds this nice?) while the boys played next to me in the $800 toy kitchen.  (Do adults with jobs even have kitchens this nice?)  Just kidding- about the nap- I did sit down on the Madeline bed, and laid up against the perfect pillows for forty-five minutes while the boys played. 

 I have to say the employees at Pottery Barn Kids were very nice.  I am sure they could tell I wasn’t going to buy anything, but they didn’t mind a tired mama camping out on the perfectly made Madeline Canopy bed, nor did they even flinch when my two boys climbed on it. At least the boys took their shoes off, before getting on the white bedding. I was hoping I didn’t miss wiping up any jelly on their hands from lunch.  They just told me to relax, and told me how cute Ryan and Cole were.  They get my vote for just being so nice.  The next time I am in the market for an item I can afford there (it won’t be the $800 kitchen though), I will get it there. 

Then we went to the play area, where the boys ran around for another hour.  Then we got a snack and headed home.  All in all it went well EXCEPT I forgot that Ryan’s medication he is taking for his double ear infection that won’t go away, makes him have to go to the bathroom in a heartbeat.  Let’s just say it sure isn’t fun dashing across the mall, trying to find a bathroom for your four-year old, when you already know his pants are a mess, and you forgot to bring 3 pairs of clean underwear for him. I wonder if he was the only other kid going commando at the mall today?

Cole was asleep as we left the parking lot, and Ryan fell asleep about ten minutes from home.  They both fell asleep tonight a few minutes after they laid down.  I am happy that they got so much exercise, and they really did have fun.  Ryan asked if we could stay at the mall longer, as we were leaving, and then as we were getting in the car, he told me Coley wanted to go back inside the mall.  I guess we’ll have to become offical mall rats the next time the weather is bad, and we have cabin fever. 

Categories
c-sections Current Events Mothering Pregnancy & Birth

The Business of Being Born – My Review

I watched The Business of Being Born  (TBOBB) last night (available now through Netflix).  This is a documentary produced by former talk show host, Ricki Lake, on the state of birthing in America.  As I posted the other night, in short the summary of the film is this: (from The Business of Being Born’s Website)

Birth: it’s a miracle. A rite of passage. A natural part of life. But more than anything, birth is a business. Compelled to find answers after a disappointing birth experience with her first child, actress Ricki Lake recruits filmmaker Abby Epstein to examine and question the way American women have babies.

The film interlaces intimate birth stories with surprising historical, political and scientific insights and shocking statistics about the current maternity care system. When director Epstein discovers she is pregnant during the making of the film, the journey becomes even more personal.

Should most births be viewed as a natural life process, or should every delivery be treated as a potentially catastrophic medical emergency?

As I settled in to watch, I was expecting a “good” documentary on a subject that interests me.  To be perfectly honest, I don’t watch very many documentaries, and had kind of figured this would be like The Baby Story, but in reverse.  Instead of seeing high drama-hospital medical births with drugs and C-sections, I would see midwives and natural home births. 

In no way was I prepared for my reaction.  Shortly into the 1 hour and 24 minute documentary, I was in tears, sobbing.  It was like a floodgate had been opened, and every vented up emotion that I had about my own experiences giving birth, was released.

I was in awe of the beautiful, natural, and peaceful births shown at home, with skilled and highly trained midwives.  During labor, the mothers were roaming around their homes, freely and unobstructed.  There was a woman who had a water birth, with her young son watching, totally calm and relaxed.  There were images of newly born home birthed babies lying peacefully and contentedly on their mother’s chests just seconds after being born, gazing lovingly up in their mother’s eyes. The mother’s, though tired from just giving birth were alert, happy, and peaceful.

Those images were contrasted with the “typical” hospital birth.  Women in bed, hooked up to monitors, oxygen masks, and IV’s, with drug cocktails dripping into their systems.  Babies left screaming and crying in the incubators by themselves, or not “allowed” to be with their mothers immediately after birth. One scene showed an exhausted mother, being prepped and wheeled off on a gurney to the operating room for a C-section.  It was not hurried, so I don’t believe it was an emergency C-section, rather more likely than not, she was not able to birth her baby in the allotted time that so many hospitals have.  She had her eyes closed, totally detached from the experience, and it struck me like she was a lamb going off to the proverbial slaughter.

It was so striking seeing that, compared to the homebirths.  The women at home were in control and had complete and entire power over the birth of their babies. They were the ones who decided when it was time to birth their baby, and they had total confidence in their bodies.  They didn’t need IV’s, drugs dripping in their systems, weakening the labor process, constant monitoring, doctors and nurses telling them when to push, and micromanaging their labors, and they didn’t need C-sections.

As I sat there watching this, I kept thinking of the women shown having their babies at home, and THAT is what birth is supposed to be like.  That is how women have given birth for thousands and thousands of years, until the last fifty years or so in America.  Women should be the ones to dictate how the birthing of their child, their flesh and blood goes, not doctors, nurses, and hospitals who have to practice defensive medicine to avoid lawsuits, and to meet insurance companies criteria. 

It was a powerful moment for me, and I realized how angry I have been about Ryan’s birth.  I have written about my C-section before, but in summary, the only reason I had to have a C-section with Ryan was because he was breech.  No other complications or problems.  A C-section was my only “option.”  Doctors don’t “do” breech vaginal deliveries anymore and certainly not where I lived.    At the time, I didn’t consider home birth an option, and in my state it is illegal for midwives to knowingly deliver a breech baby anyway. 

I trusted that my doctor was doing her best for me, but in reality she was only doing what she “had” to do. Advise me a C-section was the “safest” way to deliver a breech baby.  She was in a large HMO practice, and even though she told me about doulas and exercises I could do to try to turn the baby, she probably couldn’t have told me the truth about what I was in for, even if she had wanted to.  I am sure she had strict guidelines to operate under.

TBOBB gets right to the root of this terrible epidemic- women are basically forced to give away their birthing power and choices to the doctors and hospitals, without really realizing what is going to be “done” to them, because it is not explained for the most part to them ahead of time.  As I watched that poor, drained, and drugged, mother being wheeled off to her C-section, I saw myself in her- I saw her power gone, totally helpless and at the “mercy” of the surgeon who was about to operate on her, because her body “failed,” and she could not give birth.

I realized for the first time ever, that I felt like I had failed Ryan and failed my body, because I was not allowed to even try to give birth to him.  Even though I doubt my doctor wanted to make me feel like that, it was recorded in my subconscious, that because my baby was breech, somehow my body “failed” at being able to get him in the “correct” birthing position, and now the only option was for her to step in and “save” me, save my baby by cutting open my abdomen and performing surgery to get him out alive.  I felt totally duped and mislead. 

Never mind that babies used to be born breech all the time, even when they had less technology.  Joe’s oldest sister was born breech in the 60’s, and guess what? She was born healthy and Joe’s mother was just fine too.  Never mind that one of my good friends gave birth at home to a surprise breech footling 9.5-pound baby boy in 2006.  Guess what?  Her son couldn’t be any healthier today, and she was fine too.

I was mad after seeing the peaceful homebirths that the state of birthing in this country is what it is, in that it denies women the opportunity to have the birth that they want.  It doesn’t even allow for exploration of the choice, it just eliminates any choice whatsoever. 

I was very impressed and surprised that there were so many doctors, and OB/GYN’s in the film saying that the current system wasn’t working either. One of the doctors at Mt. Sinai in the film said something to the effect that if something isn’t done, and if someone doesn’t step in, the caesarean rate will soon be at 100%. 

Several of the doctors said that with a skilled midwife, homebirth was very safe, and was usually a good option for women.

I was thrilled to see Ina May Gaskin (the most famous midwife in the world) in the film.  I had the privilege of hearing her speak in a town near me last May.  She pointed out that she didn’t have a mother who needed a c-section in her care until birth number 187.  Contrast that with 1 in 3 births today end in a C-section. 

One of Ina May’s quotes that she had in the movie, which I loved, was right before she gave the C-section number in her practice, was an answer to the argument that women in America are different from other women in the world, hence the high C-section rate.  Right after she stated that they didn’t see a C-section until birth number 187, and then they didn’t see it again until a birth in the 300’s (I can’t remember the exact number she gave).   She said, (and I went back and reviewed several times what she said, and wrote it down), “That tells me the pelvis of the American woman is just fine-thank you very much.”

There was another man who was in the movie several times, with some powerful statistics and commentaries.  Forgive me, but I did not get his name at the beginning, and by the end of the film I was too exhausted to go back and find his name.  But he was the older gentleman with the short grey beard, and I believe he was a doctor, but am not for certain. 

He was giving a lot of background information on birth in this country, and how they used to tie and strap women down in the hospital, give drugs during labor that caused children to have severe deformities, etc.  He said at one point, “If you want a humanized birth, get the hell out of the hospital.” 

He also drew a great analogy.  He mentioned that when he speaks to groups of OB/GYN’s and tell them about home birth, he said he always gets groans and heads shaking.  Then he asks the doctor’s who have actually witnessed a home birth to raise their hands.  He said he has never gotten a doctor yet, who has actually observed a home birth.  He said they are like a geographer who is trying to describe a country that they have never been to, but are too afraid to visit.  I couldn’t agree more.    

There was another doctor an, older OB/GYN in the film who was also a researcher.  I didn’t catch his name, but I do remember his credentials.   He was from another country, (Ireland?), and had a heavy accent, so when he spoke there were subtitles.  This made it very easy to write down what he said.  He had many, many, compassionate and very true things to say about birth, and how we need to just stop down the road we are going and go back to square one.  He said square one starts with the midwife.

There were so many other important points and information in this movie.  It was amazing.  I didn’t know it was possible to make so many points about birth in just under an hour and half.  It touched me deeply, and I imagine it would strike a cord with almost any woman, whether you “believe” in homebirth or not. 

It wasn’t so much a “homebirth” message, but a message on birthing, and women are powerful and are capable of managing their births the way they want.  It shows that there are some options that we don’t hear about very often, the option of homebirth.

The only small critique I have of the film is when they showed statistics, it would have been helpful to list the source of the statistic.  It could have been listed in the closing credits, but I didn’t watch for it. I think it would have been more powerful and more creditable to list the source of the statistic when it is shown.  But it is an excellent film, and one that I hope to watch again. 

If you have even the slightest interest in maternity care, or why hospitals and doctors do the things they do during birth, this film is a must see.  It is by far the BEST media subject I have seen on birth.  If you do watch The Baby Story, watch this.  You will be astonished.  I am so grateful that this film was made.  At the very least it has helped me in the last 24 hours come to terms with the feelings I have about Ryan’s birth. 

I will leave you with a quote, which was extremely powerful for me, from the wonderful OB/GYN researcher in the film.  He said so elegantly, when talking about what we are doing is clearly not working, and is not what is best for mothers and their babies was this,” When you talk with certain women who still have a sort of intuitive knowledge of the importance of what is happening when the baby is born, they cannot accept that caesarean section is the future.  They cannot accept that.” 

Categories
Activities Cole Current Events Family & Friends Mothering Parenting Ryan Work

Take Your Sons to Work & Weekend Activities

We have had a pretty busy weekend around here.  On Friday morning we had our Music Together class.  After that I took the boys to my office, because Ryan has been asking where I work, and all kinds of questions about my office.  Plus, my boss has been wanting to meet the boys since started, and it has just never worked out before.

We got to my office about 11:15, and discovered my boss, “Jane” (not her real name) was the only person in the office.  One of the ladies had called in sick, and the other person was a client’s office.  So Ryan and Cole had the place to themselves.  Ryan walked right up to Jane, stuck his hand out to shaker her hand and said, “Hi, I’m Ryan.  Nice to meet you.”  He was so cute and not shy at all! 

Jane got stamps out for the boys and let them stamp their hearts out.  Cole progressed from paper, to stamping his shirt.  Of course, I dressed them up in nicer than normal clothes, so I have yet to see if the red ink will come out of the shirt. 

I finished up a tiny bit of work, while Ryan and Cole “worked” too.  They were very busy three-hole punching paper, highlighting accounts, and of course stamping.  Then Jane was trying to fax a really long document and Ryan was very interested in the fax machine.  I tried to move him away from the fax, while Jane was trying to use it, and Jane told me it was OK- he wasn’t in the way.  Then Ryan said, “Yea Mom, I’m working with Jane.”  He proceeded to follow her around the rest of the visit, and ask her about all of her pictures of her family on her desk in her office. 

The favorite part of the day was the shredder.  We have a closed and locked bin where all documents go, and then once a month a company comes and shreds the entire bag.  We can open it if we need to, but there is a slot where we slide the papers down.  Ryan and Cole were just enthralled with that.  I guess for little boys, that was just way too cool. 

Another funny thing was about half way through the visit Ryan told me he had to go pee.  I took him to the bathroom, and after he was done, he asked, “Is this where Jane goes poopie?”  I had to laugh at that one.

As we were leaving Jane told Ryan and Cole that they had both been very good boys, and they were welcome back anytime.  Ryan smiled at her and said, “OK, we’ll come back then and finish our work.”  Then he hugged her.  I would have to say that I think Ryan has a little crush on Jane, which is very sweet.

Then I treated the boys to lunch at our favorite noodle place, just up the street.  We had an awesome view of the mountains, and just had a fun lunch talking about the office.

On Saturday I took Ryan to his friends fourth birthday party, where he of course, had a ball.  He got to dress up as a fireman, make a train placemat, play grocery store, play with all kinds of trucks, trains, and toys, and play outside.  The party was in a city-operated preschool, where they have birthday parties on the weekends.  The best part for him was the birthday cake-of course. 

It was fun for me too, because Cole stayed home with Joe, so he could have his nap, so I got to visit with my friends more than I normally do at parties like this.  It was a nice afternoon.

Then the reason Cole needed his nap was we went to my dad’s house for dinner, to see my grandmother, Mimi, who is in town for a few weeks.  She comes to “the big city” to get away from the cold winters where she lives.  Mimi is the only great-grandmother that Ryan and Cole have, so it is very important they visit with her when they can.  Ryan gave her lots of hugs, and Cole did too, once he got used to her.  We had a yummy dinner, and got to visit.

Today Joe, Cole, and I made a Costco run, while Ryan was at Grandma and Grandpa’s house.  Then Joe took Cole out there, and I found myself alone- with no kids.  How often does that happen?  I went for a really, really, long walk and it was great, despite it being windy.  Now I am off to fold some laundry and get some dinner ready.

I am also excited about the Academy Awards tonight.  I LOVE to see all the fashions, and will write my Mama’s Blog Second Annual Academy Awards Fashion Reveiew” tonight, hopefully.  So check in later to see who made my best dressed, and worst dressed list, as well as the overall winner in my book for best and worst dressed.  Enjoy the show dah’lings.  🙂