Category: Health

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Cancer Family & Friends Health low iodine diet Me Parenting

Thyroid Cancer-D-Day!

I am so happy today!  Today is the the day I finally can take synthroid- the thyroid replacement hormone.  It will have been just two days under two months, since I have been without any thyroid hormones in my body.  I took my first one at 7AM.  I will have to take this medication for the rest of my life. 

The doctors tell me it is not a quick fix, and it is a gradual return to feeling better and normal.  So I am not expecting to take one synthroid and be back to my “old self” but after this long of being in the hypothyroidism state,  I am hopeful  today the downwards trend I have been experiencing for the last eight weeks stops.  It is very rare for the first dosage to be correct, so I am expecting to have to go through a few dosage adjustments as well. 

My doctor also prescribed cytomel for two weeks, to “jump start” my system. I didn’t wake up one day and feel this tired, this fatigued- it was a definite gradual downward change- every day was a little worse than the last, so I am hoping that with feeling better it will be the same.  As long as I feel a little better than the day before, I’ll feel like I am heading in the right direction.  I have to have my blood tested in six weeks to check the dosage, but if I don’t feel better after a few days, I will be calling the endocrinologist.  

Today is also the day I stop the low iodine diet.  It was nice to eat so many fresh foods and vegetables- I am going to try to keep that part of the diet going, but it will be nice to have some milk with cereal, tea again, and I have been craving  homemade popcorn with lots of butter on it.  🙂  I found the hardest part of the diet was just preparing the foods since I have been in the hypothyroidism state for so long.

I received my radioactive iodine therapy (in the form of a pill) on Monday, and  I am radioactive as I write this.  I can be around adults no more than 30 minutes at a time, but can’t place myself in a general population where there would be children, until Thursday.  However, the nuclear medicine doctor, who administered the pill, strongly suggested that I am not around my boys for five to seven days.  She said because of their ages, their cells are much more vulnerable to radioactivity, and it is hard for them to not climb on me, and keep an arms distance away.

I thought I was going to be able to see the boys on Thursday, and I am very sad and miss them like crazy, but under the circumstances, I agree with her.  I don’t want to put my boys at risk and in the grand scheme of things, two more days is worth it, if it eliminates the risk they will be exposed to radiation.  Their dad and his family have been taking care of the boys, and Ryan and Cole have been having a lot of fun. 

I have been at home- really having no energy to do much.  I have been reading, catching up on some paperwork, and I took a very short walk yesterday.  It’s kind of weird thinking of myself being quarantined, but since I have very little energy I don’t feel like going anywhere.

This has really been the hardest thing I have ever had to do, physically.   No energy, fatigue, no mental energy- that is how my body felt physically for so many weeks. 

My family and friends told me to hang in there and not give up- there is light at the end of the tunnel. So many people told me I am stronger than I know.  I didn’t believe them- I certainly didn’t feel strong. In fact, these last two months,  is the weakest I have ever been, physically and mentally. But I learned there is nothing wrong with being weak- I can’t do it all- no one can, and being weak allowed me to accept this. Being at my weakest for so long, showed me that I am stronger than I knew, stronger than I believed. 

I feel like today is my new beginning.  I am finally at the end of this tunnel- and I just don’t see the light, I am in the light.   I have discovered, that I am strong, but there is no shame in being weak either.  Others could see that in me, and now I see it for myself.  But more importantly, today, I believe it.

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Cancer Family & Friends Health

Friends

 

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In everyone’s life, at some time, our inner fire goes out.  It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being.  We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit.  ~Albert Schweitzer

I have written many times over the past few months how grateful I am to my family and friends, and the help they have given to me while I undergo thyroid cancer surgery and treatment. 

As the days progress, and I am now in my seventh week after my thyroidectomy and neck dissection, still without any thyroid replacement hormones, I have had to rely on my family and friends more than ever.  

I literally have to get through the days, hour by hour, because waking up and facing a whole day in its entirety is too overwhelming. I honestly don’t know how I am going to make it hour to hour, let alone an entire day.  I have found though, in these hours, my friends have stepped in and made them manageable and give me that extra boost I need to make it through to the next hour.

I could have never imagined after all these weeks that have passed, the friendship and love that continues to flow my way.  Today I had an exceptionally hard day-  I just had no energy, and I mean none.  Sitting in a chair was making me tired.  During the last week or so, I have developed an insomia- I am so tired I can’t keep my eyes open, but yet I am unable to sleep.  I can sleep for about 30 minutes at a time and then I am awake for hours.  I am sure it is hormone related, and will clear up, but this has taken its toll on me, physically and emotionally.   

Over the weeks, my friends have cooked, brought over meals, cleaned the house, mowed the lawns, and have sent me notes of encouragement. Some friends make me laugh, some friends don’t let me feel sorry for myself, some friends encourage me.  I am so grateful for all these kind acts shown to me.  It is like a bouquet of flowers- each flower adding something unique to the bouquet. 

Today I received a sweet message from one of my oldest friends, J.  She was my best friend in middle school, and we have been out of touch for years.  We have recently been in touch via Facebook.  We actually live in the same state and have been trying to get together.  But because of my health right now, I can’t.  She wrote me such an encouraging note, and she hasn’t seen me in 20 years. 

One of the moms in my mom’s group is battling breast cancer.  She is in her final round of chemotherapy, and she sent me an e-mail saying she had missed that I had thyroid cancer.  She has gone through so much more than I have, and she took the time out to send me a note of encouragement.  I was in tears reading her words.  We have only met a few times, as we live in different cities, but I was so touched by her strength and encouragement.  It was like a shot of pure confidence that I can and will get through this. 

My lawn was severely overgrown.  It was budding with weeds.  It looked awful, and there is a lot of lawn between the front and the back yards.   It depressed me every time I saw it.  Seven weeks ago, I was mowing the lawns myself. 

My friend, Melissa (NatureDeva), and her husband came over.  Melissa mowed the lawns in 90 degree heat, and then asked what else she could do for me.  Her husband, M., came over too and built window well covers for three basement windows, and cleaned them out, so the boys would be safe while playing outside.  Then he tried to fix the garage door opener for me.  They have a son Ryan’s age, and they could have been spending time with, but they helped my family today. 

My spirits instantly soared when I saw the mowed lawns- it was like that symbol that everything is going to be okay, and for now things are.  I can’t thank Melissa and her husband enough.

I also can’t think of all that my friend, Amy (Crunchy Domestic Goddess), has done for me without getting tears in my eyes.  From the day I told her I could possibly have thyroid cancer to the present, she has been right there with me.  From letting me vent, to calling me, to offering her help, to cooking, to organizing, to visting me in the hospital,  to thinking of ways to help me-all the while she has been battling some very tough issues herself, and being a full-time mom. 

One of the most unexpected things Amy has done, was she entered us in a contest to win an all expense paid trip to New York City next year, to attend the annual blogging conference by BlogHer.  We both made plans to go this year, and obviously I couldn’t, but Amy went last week to Chicago for her first BlogHer conference. 

Her roommate told her about a contest, Mabel’s Labels was having- the Wish You Were Here Contest. An attendee to BlogHer this year had to submit a video of themselves saying who they wished could have been there with them.  Amy’s entry explained why she wished I was there with her, and the reason why I was not. 

Yesterday she found out that her video made the finals!  They only picked 10 finalists and will hold a random drawing on Tuesday to determine the winner.  I was so excited to hear that we made the finals- it has been a great pick me up, and has been a fun distraction imagining if we really won- all the fun we would have together in New York next summer!  Even if we don’t win, I am so touched that she took the time to do this- I know she did it more for me than for herself. You can click here to see Amy’s video entry- she is the last one. 

Thank you doesn’t cover it, but right now that is all I can say- Thank you to all my friends, for everything you have done and continue to do for me. I know you all are busy, and have your own families to take care of.  But for the time you have given to me and to my boys, when I can’t do it myself- thank you.  It means more to me than I will ever be able to tell you or thank you.

My inner spirit is rekindled every day by your actions, words, and positive thoughts you send my way.  I would not be able to make it through this without all of you. I am so lucky to have such a beautiful bouquet of friends.  I love you all.    

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Cancer Cooking Health low iodine diet Me

Low Iodine Diet Food & Information

I can’t write much, but a picture speaks a thousand words.  The boys’ dad watched them for the weekend, and my dad took me shopping for low iodine food for the week.  Then he helped me chop, dice, and grilled the chicken and meat.  This was all recommended to be done before I was in the hypothyroidism state, so it was very difficult to get it done, but we did. 

The diet says you can eat meat you prepare yourself, and as many fruit and veggies,  as you want (no soy), but I can’t get enough protein from the fruits and veggies I need, so having the meat will help me immensely with my energy level for the week.   

The website that I got some of the recipes from (you can download their free cookbook), and read up on the low iodine diet, is ThyCa– (Thyroid Cancer Survivors Association).  I found it to be very helpful, and so far the recipes have turned out great. One good tip they had was to read the labels.  We started to buy some organic ingredients, but found the organic black beans for instant, had sea salt in them, which is worse than just regular salt, because sea salt is higher in iodine.  I would have never had know that, if I had not read through their information.

 Here is a picture of most of the low iodine food we were able to prepare:

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I would have never been able to do it without the help of my and my boys’ family, so thank you.  I am still waiting to hear when I can take the thyroid replacement hormone.  Until I can take it, I am not going to start feeling better, but as of today there is only one week to go on the low iodine diet.

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Cancer Family & Friends Health Me Mothering

Thyroid Cancer- Low Iodine Diet & Waiting for Radioactive Iodine Treatment

This past week has been a nightmare- an absolutely awful nightmare.  I don’t even know where to begin. 

As I wrote previously, my surgeon said one of the proactive things I could do before having my thyroidectomy and neck dissection was make an appointment with an endocrinologist.  So I did.  One he recommended at one of the hospitals in my state, Colorado, with an excellent reputation. 

When I made the appointment back in MAY, I specifically pointed out to the scheduler, that my surgery was June 12th, and the appointment with the endocrinologist wasn’t until this past Tuesday- July 21st.  She assured me that was fine.  I asked her again- that six weeks wasn’t too long to go.  She told me again, it was fine.  These are the “experts” so I figured I was in good hands.

Six weeks later I am a hormonal, emotional, tired, wiped out mess.  I feel like I have aged 50 years in the past six weeks.  Evidently the hormone your thyroid produces regulates all kinds of bodily functions- like energy levels, emotions, metabolism, memory, concentration- just to name a few.  When I met with the endocrinologist on Tuesday, Dr. S., (another Dr. S.) she was shocked to find out I had not been on any thyroid hormone since my surgery.  She looked at me and said, “My god, I bet you feel like crap.”  That is one part they did get right.  She told me they would rush my radioactive iodine treatment (RAI).  Only problem- I haven’t been on a low iodine diet. 

I called a week after my surgery and asked this same office if I should be on a low iodine diet.  They told me no- I would receive all that information at my appointment. I pointed out again, that I had a six week time frame, and they told me it was fine.  I’d learn everything about the diet during my appointment. 

Since I can no longer manage this mess by myself, my sister, Vanessa, called bothered them until she got the person on the line that could help.  That is how we found out the scheduler had “old” information.  The treatment coordinator, B., told her I could have received RAI three weeks after surgery, but I have to be on the low iodine diet now for ten days.  I could have started the diet the week I called to ask them about the low iodine diet, and have had all of this behind me.  But now I have almost two more weeks of “feeling like crap” and trying to figure out a diet and what I can and can’t eat. Vanessa expressed the displeasure this has caused me, and the state I am in.   B. apologized and sent me a personal e-mail apologizing as well.  Vanessa scheduled the RAI treatment for me, for August 3. 

I am so mad and beyond frustrated at this hospital.  I talked to a friend who is a nurse,  who told me this is negligence, and there is no excuse for something like this happening.  But, what can I do?  It isn’t B.’s fault.  It is one of those nightmare things that you never imagine will happen to you, but it does.  So somehow, my family and I have to get through the next 2 weeks to make it to the appointment where I can receive the RAI treatment.

I still don’t know how long after the RAI treatment I have to wait until I can receive the replacement thyroid hormone.  As it is now, it will be 8 weeks and counting.  In the meantime, I am losing more energy every day, my boys are suffering, and I am missing work. 

I am having a hard time with this blog post.  I said I was taking a break from it two weeks ago, but then I said I wasn’t, but I am going to be forced to now.  I mentally and physically do not have the energy to write much until I am finally on the thyroid replacement hormone.  For now, what energy I do have, I have to put into my boys and into my health. I will try to post quick updates on Twitter when I can. 

I appreciate any thoughts and prayers you can send my way- two weeks seems like an eternity right now, but there is nothing left to do, except get through them.  Thanks again to everyone for all their support, love, and help. I literally could not do this without my family and friends.  Love you all. 

Heather

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Cancer Health Me Mothering

Thyroid Cancer Recovery Update

I know I said I was going to take a mini break from blogging, but I miss it.  It is a good outlet for me, so I am changing my mind and deciding I just am not going to be able to blog as much as I have in the past.

During the last week, I have noticed the lack of hormones kick in- just as my Dr. said they would.  I was never very hormonal when pregnant, but in a a way I feel like I am now.  I will be happy and fine, and then for no reason I will just start crying for ten minutes, really hard- and then I will be feeling fine again, until the next time it happens.  Not knowing when this is going to happen is hard- especially around my boys.  They ask me why I am crying and I tell them it is just part of mommy having to get well again.

I have been able to do almost all the rehab exercises for my shoulder, except for a few where  I am supposed to hang my neck down. That just hurts too much to do it right now, and my Dr. said don’t do any of the exercises that cause pain.  Just trying to keep up with a house and two boys is giving my shoulder a good workout. I am trying to do light chores with it- ones that don’t hurt but ones that I can use the muscles. 

I have been able to cut my pain medication into about half the dosage- it says  I can take one every four hours, but I am finding I can go about six to eight hours between one.  The other day, I tried cutting them out all together and just taking Advil.  OUCH!  Clearly I am not ready for that, but I feel when my current perscription of pain medication is gone, I will hopefully be ready to just be on ibuprofen.  I have had wonderful friends do yard work, and stop by with flowers and food, and of course my family has been there every step of the way too.  I know that has contributed in my being able to rest and not overdo it. 

I meet with the endocrinologist next week to find out what I have to do prepare for the radioactive iodine treatment I need, and I know that is going to involve my diet.  I haven’t had much of an appetite at all.  My doctor said usually after surgery, most patients gain weight because the thyroid controls your metabolism.  That has been the opposite for me.  I have been forcing down light foods like chicken, pasta salads, tuna, yogurt, and cheese.  But nothing sounds good to eat.  I have even stopped drinking coffee in the morning.  If you know me you know I LOVE coffee, but the thought of smelling coffee actually makes me nauseous.

I slept for almost 14 hours yesterday and woke up and felt like I hadn’t slept at all- another aspect the thyroid controls.  So I feel tired all the time.  I get bouts of energy where I will do what needs to be done, and then I am pretty much wiped out for the day. 

My sister had her annual exam yesterday and she made them check her thyroid.  They said it felt fine, but they were going to test her levels anyway in view of my situation, which made me happy.  I have talked to a lot of people who have never had their thyroids felt during their exams.  As I wrote here, and as everyone told me, if you have to have cancer, thyroid cancer is the “best” one to have, but it is still cancer.  I didn’t have to have the neck dissection on both sides of my neck, because of early detection.

But my neck aches every minute of the day.  It feels like my neck was cut off, and sewn back on.  There is no good cancer to have- I am grateful mine is so treatable and the survival rate is so high, but having your thyroid out (and lymph nodes as well in my case) is not something you ever want to have to go through.

I plan to write an amazing review of a scar healing product that was sent to me, but I want to devote an entire post to that, but I have been truly amazed by it.  I am going to post some updated pictures of my scar, because I feel this is life- cancer happens, and people do recover. 

I lost someone who I thought was a friend, over my posting my cancer surgery pictures from my blog, but the e-mails from people that are experiencing cancer themselves, or have just found out they have thyroid cancer has been overwhelming.  Not a day goes by without someone sending me an e-mail, thanking me for sharing my story, because it has helped them, or someone they love who is dealing with thyroid cancer. 

My goal in posting my cancer story, pictures, and recovery is not to be gross, or muster up sympathy for myself, but to help people realize that it is a condition that you can be treated for and recover from.  It is not a pleasant experience, but you can recover.  I recently read something I really liked about cancer- it said, “Cancer is a word- not a sentence,” and I feel that is so true.  Life hands us experiences, like cancer, we never expect, but the body, mind, and spirit can recover- and it does. 

If looking at scar pictures bother you, please don’t look any further. I plan to have more pictures when I write the review of the scar healing product but for now, here is how my scar is doing:

 

 

Scar on June 26, 20096-26-092copy

 

 

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Scar on July 15, 2009

I know I sound like a broken record, but I just can’t thank everyone enough for the love and support that you continue to send my way.  It helps me more than you will ever know- Thank you.