Taking a break from work, I feel the need to comment on a disturbing and growing trend in my town- perhaps it is invading your town as well- I am refering to the car sticker families, that are popping up on the back of cars and mini-van windows at an alarming rate.
If you haven’t had the “pleasure” of seeing these stickers yet, consider yourself lucky, but here is picture of what I am talking about (you can click on the picture to see it larger):
“Oh tell me it it isn’t so!” you might be saying now, as you cover your eyes in horror. Yes, sorry it is true and what is worse- I am seeing stickers with the actual names of the family members underneath their “person.”
What is UP with this? If you happen to have one of these stickers, I don’t mean to offend you, and please leave a comment and let me know what the reasoning is behind these. I have some questions about these stickers:
First, why is there a need for these stickers? Are we really becoming a culture that thinks every stranger driving behind us wants to know or needs to know the members of our family? Why is there a need to “advertise” who family members are to the driving public? Will there be a song blaring out of the car next (like and ice-cream truck) sung to the tune of “Who Are The People in your Neighborhood?” from Sesame Street, that goes, “Who Are The People in my Mini-Van?” Are the people who have these stickers afraid they will forget who is in their family, and put these on their car for that god-awful day when they say,
“Oh **** I can’t remember the name of my wife, kids, or pets. Thank God, I can look at the back window of the min-van and remember!”
(Sorry to inform you, you can also get pets added to your family sticker- see the above picture- I won’t even go there.)
Finally, are these stickers the new mark of true suburbia? In keeping up with the Jones’s and living the “American Dream,” we have to have a house with a white picket fence, 2.5 kids (preferably a boy and a girl), those 2.5 kids play soccer, and a mini-van. Now do we have to have the sticker family on the back of the mini-van? When will the insanity end?
I for one, hope this is one trend that is shorter than Paris Hilton’s jail stay. At first I only saw these stickers on mini vans, and figured it was those people who were into them- you know, the arts and crafts type, who have every picture of their life perfectly organized into perfect scrap-books, and their walls at home have one-of-a kind crafts hanging in every nook and cranny? Not that that there is anything wrong with that, I just thought these stickers would be that target market.
But now I am seeing them on the back of every car from A-Z. From Audi’s, to Hondas, to SUV’s, to trucks, to sedans, to hybrids, to mini-vans. I imagine the kids of these families, who I can’t help but know their names now- (thank-you-very-much-sticker-family-mom’s-and-dad’s) the Madison’s, Jack’s, and even Rover the dog, and Cleo, the goldfish, will look back at this trend in 20 years, and laugh, and wonder what the heck their parents were thinking?
Much the way people in my generation laugh about those awful yellow “Baby on Board” signs, and the Garfield stuffed animals with suction cups, that were stuck on every window. Is anyone now happy they put those items on their windows? The more important question is will anyone admit and are proud that they attached those items? I didn’t think so. That leads me to my last point- if you are thinking about getting one of these stickers, please, please don’t. Just say no, and let’s try to work together to stop the trend.
If the peer pressure is getting too much- your HOA is demanding you have your own car sticker family, to keep up with the appearance of the neighborhood, or you can’t put off your friends any longer-they want to know when you will be getting your own car sticker family, then please do the rest of your fellow drivers a favor and at least get this one:
Thank you.
(Yes, you can really get this sticker too- just type in “Ass Family Car Stickers” into your search-engine if you really must have one.)