Category: Mothering

Categories
Breastfeeding Health Mothering Ryan

Another Sick Child

Ryan has now come down with the virus Cole had last week.  I honestly can’t remember the last time he has been sick, and he is so miserable.  He just curls up on the couch in the fetal position- poor little guy!  He also has turned into a little dictator- hurling “commands” at me one after another- “I need some water,” I want to watch a little TV,” “I want mac & cheese for lunch,” and so forth.  Since he is hardly ever like this, I am playing “genie’ and his wish is my command.

Children’s Motrin does help him A LOT.  He will go from crying and curled up, to up and playing, and generally back to his happy self. 

I think he is on the tail-end of it, at least I hope so.  After not having a vacation since 2005, due to pregnancy and having a newborn, we are scheduled to leave for a 9 day vacation on Sunday.  I sure hope he is better by then.  For now, I’m making sure he rests and trying to keep him from feeling too bad.  I also hope Joe and I don’t come down with it, all though it seems to be pretty mild, so even if we do catch it, hopefully we’ll be able to handle it. 

It sure has been a rough summer for viruses and us. It is crazy.  I hope we have “paid our dues,” and won’t be this sick in the winter.  This has not been fun at all!

For everyone else who has sick kiddies, hang in there and I feel your pain. 

One funny thing though, tonight we went to Target to get some supplies, and Ryan was sitting in the shopping cart, feeling pretty good, as Joe pushed him.  We walked by the bra’s where they are all on display, and Ryan pointed to them and said, “That’s where nursies go!”

Categories
Cole Health Me Mothering Ryan

Body By Babies

I have been feeling pretty good lately about getting back to my BBW (before baby weight).  With Ryan, I lost all my baby weight within 6 months.  I didn’t exercise or try- it just came off, by itself (lucky me!)

Cole just turned 14 months, and I *still* haven’t quite lost all the baby weight.  I seem to be stuck at those last five pounds.  However, I have heard that when you nurse, your body will usually hold on to ten extra pounds so your body will have something to make milk from if you don’t get enough food.  (I suppose this is back from cave-man days).  I am still nursing Cole, so perhaps this is another reason I can’t lose the rest of the weight.

I also notice on days that he wants to nurse more, like when he is teething, sick, or tired, the next day I am very hungry.  On days when he doesn’t want to nurse much, I am not as hungry.

I am guessing since I am older the second time around my metabolism slowed down a bit, and I also had a very stressful year with Cole, and I know I ate more during the past year.

I am happy though, that my weight is where it is, considering I gained 50 pounds with Ryan, and a whopping 60 pounds with Cole!  (I get so hungry when I am pregnant- what can I say?!)  I have been able to get into some of my pre-pregnancy clothes again, but not my shorts!

I have been reduced to wearing two pairs of shorts when I go out in public that don’t fit- they are too big, and I have to constantly be pulling them up, but then next size down, is too small. Of course I have about 20 pairs of pre-pregnancy shorts, that I spent a small fortune on, that as my sister says, “taunt me from the closet.”  Amen.   Oh yes, I could squeeze my mama hips into them, but can’t button them over my new friend- “mama pooch” on my stomach.

I always had a flat stomach before having babies.  I think those days are gone.  My pooch doesn’t seem to be going anywhere, anytime soon.  I have one pair of pre-pregnancy shorts that I can actually fit into, but they button higher on the waist, and let me tell you- it is a struggle to get them buttoned.  I never liked the below waist, shorts or pants, but now they are my best friend, because the button below “mama pooch.”

I look at all my shorts folded in the closet that I can’t wear.  I don’t want to get rid of them because I just know one day I’ll be able to wear them again (yeah, right) but I don’t want to buy a lot of new ones because 1- summer is almost over, and 2- I am hoping that when I do lose the last five pounds, maybe a few inches from “mama pooch” will disappear too, and I will be able to wear *some* of them again.

That brings me to my next point- I am going to have to get rid of the shorter shorts- because let’s face it- NO ONE, me included- wants to see this much of my lower thighs.  Before babies- I liked shorter shorts, and wore them all the time.  After babies- no way- there is enough suffering in the world without me subjecting people to that view.  🙂

However, we are going on a beach vacation next week, and I have had it!  I want some shorts that fit me as I am now.  No more “baggy butt” shorts.  I don’t want to spend another small fortune on shorts that I hopefully will never wear again, so a few days ago; I went to a nice consignment shop in town with Ryan, after his swim lessons.

I grabbed all the pairs of shorts I could find in one size up from the stash I have at home, and was confident out of the 50 pairs I had- a few would fit.  After trying them ALL on, NONE fit! What was worse was I would sit down in them, and my friend “mama pooch,” would show up, outlining herself from within.  Even Ryan noticed- he poked her, and said, “You got chubbies there.”  Uh, thanks son.  But he was telling the truth- I looked like I was 3 or 4 months pregnant in these shorts.

We left soon after, and I wondered if I was doomed to a life of “baggy butt” shorts, or looking like I was pregnant.  I marveled at the time I could walk into an Old Navy store, walk right up to the shorts, know exactly what size I wore, know they would fit, and would buy them without trying them on.  I knew those days were over- when you allow babies to live rent free in your body for nine months, your body will never be the same. 

I tried a few more stores today, and nothing-nada-ziltch.  Same problem.  Shorts one size smaller were too small, and the size I have now are too big.  I was feeling really depressed, as I went into the last store in my town that sells shorts.  Cole was with me, and he was in a really good mood and happy.  I found a few pairs to try on, but in all honesty they looked like mom shorts.  Not the cute styles I like.  🙁

On a whim, I decided to go over to the juniors department to torment myself further.  Talk about *major* depression!  The size large shirts I doubt would even cover one side of me.  But then I saw them… they were taunting me like the shorts that sit in my closet, but these came in more than one size.  In a moment of insanity, I picked up two pairs of some cute cargo jean shorts with an “at below waist” style with a drawstring (not that I would need to pull them tighter over “mama pooch”), that didn’t look too short, or too long.   They were the same style, just two different sizes. 

Back to the dressing room we went.  I felt like I was getting ready for a first date!  I actually had butterflies in my stomach, and I started talking to the shorts.

     “Please shorts, fit. Fit.  I don’t ask a lot out of life, but you would make me very happy if I could have one pair of shorts that don’t have “baggy butt,” or show “mama pooch.”

The first pair was the larger size, and I had to actually pull the drawstring in.  They fit!- well sort of.  As I sat down, they crept down.  Less attractive than “baggy butt,” or “mama pooch,” is butt crack. 

Well, I knew there was no way the smaller size would fit, but in another moment of insanity, I pulled them on.  Wait…they buttoned.  Good sign.  I tied the drawstring- not to hold them up, but to just tie them.  Another good sign.  Length was nice- hides upper thighs, but aren’t down to my knees, and “baggy butt” was nowhere to be found.  Okay, now came the test. I slowly sat down, not wanting the moment to end.  I forced myself to look in the mirror, and she was not there! 

“Mama pooch,” was not making an appearance!  I turned around, and butt crack wasn’t there either!  Then I heard the angels sing “Hallelujah, Hallelujah!”   I did it!  Three days, 6 stores, and probably 100 pairs of shorts later, I did the near impossible.  Found ONE pair of shorts that fit, and I actually look nice in. 

I can’t believe in the end it was the junior shorts that fit, but it makes sense now, because I was shopping in women’s and I guess that one size up from the woman’s size that wouldn’t fit, is the size I ended up with in juniors!  Who would have guessed?

I do know that I never want to shop for another pair of shorts again.  Hopefully it will stay warm for a while, because frankly, the thought of having to go jean shopping terrifies me.  But for now, I’m happy. 

Beach here I come, sans my three “friends,” “baggy butt,” “butt crack,” and “mama pooch.”  

Categories
Breastfeeding Cole Health Mothering Parenting

First ER Visit

As your baby grows, you can’t help but mark events by the “firsts.”  First smile, first tooth, first time they sleep through the night, etc. 

I count myself lucky that in the 3.5 years, since having children, I have not had to have that “First-visit-to-the- emergency-room,”- until last night. 

Cole had a fever all day on Wednesday, and he felt unusually warm.  He was drooling up a storm, and his gums were swollen, so I figured he was teething- maybe getting in a molar.  At 8:30, before bed, I gave him the suggested dose of infant Motrin for his age / weight (1.875 ml).

He went to bed, and I was wondering why he felt so warm- even when he is teething, he never felt that warm before.  I could hear him on the monitor, kind of calling out in his sleep, but he didn’t wake up until 10:30, and when I picked him up to nurse, I was alarmed.  He felt extremely hot.  I took his temperature, and it was 103. 

I remember from once when Ryan had a fever, we called in after hours to the Children’s Hospital, and the nurse said until he had a fever for 72 hours, or it reached 105, there really was no need for him to be seen by a doctor, so I figured I would watch Cole, and just keep monitoring him.  Sometimes it is good to let the fever work itself out on its own- it is the body’s way of building up the immune system, and fighting whatever it is.

I went to bed around midnight, and slept for an hour.  At 1, Cole woke up, moaning, and he was still burning up.  I nursed him again, and placed a cool washcloth on his head (what my mom did for me, when I had a fever, but he didn’t like it) and he drifted back to sleep, but I was wide-awake. 

Something just didn’t seem right.  He was way to hot, to just have a fever from teething.  As I lay there, listening to him moan, and roll around, kind of delirious, I wondered if something could have bitten him.  He has been playing outside a lot lately with Ryan, and maybe a spider could have bitten him.

I hadn’t noticed anything unusual when I gave him a bath, earlier that evening, but I hadn’t been looking either.  I turned on the light, and started checking every inch of his body.  I didn’t see anything.  I woke up Joe, and told him Cole had a fever.  We talked about what it could be, and then I took his temperature again- under the arm- and it had dropped to 102.5. 

I felt better, like it was dropping a bit, and there were no spider bites bulging out on his body, so I went back to sleep.

Cole woke up at 3, wanting to nurse again, and when I picked him up, he felt very hot again.  I nursed him for about 10 minutes, and he started to gag, and then he vomited.  I stood up, to try to get him to the bathroom, and he vomited again, and again.  He was crying, his cheeks were flushed, and his eyes looked glassy.  Poor little guy!

I placed him on the cool bathroom floor, and took off his PJ bottoms, (earlier, I had taken off his top to keep him cool), and took his temperature, rectally.  It was 105.2.  He was shaking too.  I cleaned up the vomit off my arms, and Cole, and then brought him into Joe.  He was crying, and I told Joe, I was going to take him to the ER, since his temperature was so high, and he had vomited.   I quickly got dressed, and put a romper on Cole.

We live less than five minutes from the hospital, and at 4am, there was no traffic, so we got there quickly.  There were no  other patients in the ER, so we didn’t have to wait at all. 

The triage nurse took his temperature again, and it was 104.7, and she said the dose of infant Motrin that I had given to Cole before bed, was hardly any at all.  (funny since that is what the box said to give).  Anyway, they brought him a dose of Motrin and Children’s Tylenol, and said that would help bring the fever down.

Cole was awake, and did NOT like to have the nurse touch him. He screamed the entire time she was checking him.  She took us to a room, and said, the Dr. would be in, shortly.  He calmed down after a few minutes, and everyone left.  Since he had just gotten the medicine, and he had been vomiting, I didn’t want to nurse him in case his tummy was full.

The doctor came in after about fifteen minutes, and asked lots of questions, and checked Cole’s ears, throat, and diaper area. 

He said he probably had a virus or a viral infection.  He said they wanted us to stay until his fever went down a bit, and to see if he could keep some liquids down.  I told him I wanted to nurse him, and surprisingly, he said, “That would be really good for him.”  So the doctor shut the door for us, on his way out, so we had privacy, and Cole nursed for about 5 minutes and then fell asleep, for about an hour, while we waited.

A nurse came and took his temperature and it had dropped to 102.  Cole nursed again, and a few minutes later the doctor came back, and said he said he didn’t see anything out of the ordinary and since he didn’t have a lot of secondary symptoms (like coughing, diarrhea, etc.) and since Cole was up-to-date-on his immunizations, he wasn’t going to torture him, and order blood work.  

He said it was good I brought him in, and he said when babies his age get high fevers, they can have seizures.  The nurse also added that if you try to bring down the fever too quickly, a seizure could also occur.  The doctor  said to watch him for the next few days, and if Motrin & Tylenol didn’t control the fever,  or if he starts having any secondary symptoms, to go to our regular doctor for a follow-up.

He asked me if he had nursed him, and I told him yes, and obviously he had kept it down.  Then the doctor stunned me and asked if he had been breastfed since birth.  I told him yes, and he said, “That is great.  That is so good for him, and you should keep doing it as long as you want.  He looks like an extremely healthy baby.” 

I thanked the doctor and nurse for their help, and the nurse went over the doses of medicine to give Cole, and we got to go home.  We got home at 6:30, to Ryan awake, and Joe getting ready for work.

I was stressed out, realizing Joe was going to work, having had virtually NO sleep, and the prospect of the day ahead, which included taking Cole over to Joe’s parents house, while Ryan and I went to his swim lesson.  I also had to clean up the bedding, and Joe said he would clean up the carpet when he got home.  I turned on PBS, and while Ryan ate breakfast and watched Clifford, Cole and I caught a 45-minute nap. 

We got going and made it to Grandma’s and our swimming lesson.  When we were done, we went and got Cole’s medicine, and went back to get Cole.  He had done great, and had taken a nap.  He still felt cool as well.

Later in the afternoon, after his nap, his fever was back, at 103.5. I gave him the Motrin and Tylenol before bed, and he has been sleeping soundly since.  I am so glad he seems like he is doing better. 

It is so scary when something like that happens to your baby, and they can’t talk to you and tell you what is wrong.  I am glad that we did take him in, just to know that there isn’t a bigger problem looming.  It also was wonderful to hear from a doctor (that was around my age) that breastfeeding is good, and to keep doing it.  It kind of gave me hope, that the medical profession is realizing and knows that breastfeeding is so important for a baby.

I hope Cole’s temperature will stay down tonight and he’ll feel better tomorrow.  He is such a sweet little guy- I hate it when he isn’t feeling good. 

So that concludes my story of my first trip to the ER as a mother.  I hope it will be a long time before I have to go again, or better yet- I hope I won’t have to ever go again.  But with two active little boys, I have a feeling I’ll be there again.  🙂 

Categories
Breastfeeding Mothering

Oh, The Irony-Breastfeeding in Public-UPDATE!

Here is the latest regarding Kristen, the mother, who was asked this week to “use common sense” and cover up, by park officials while she was trying to nurse her 5 month old son, at a water park in Denver.

  • Kristen posted an update to the Mothering.com chat room, where she initially posted her story.  Here is her update:
Wow, looks like a lot went on while I was gone. the posts look like they are gone so I can not read them. I am sad my most recent post is gone (the one I made last night—post 88 maybe?) however as it was fairly important and explained a few things.

Hmmm…where to start. Well, I was in the Rocky Mountain National Park all day at the top of the rockies (I am NOT letting this ruin my vacation) and am now finally at my computer at the hotel. I did some thinking and decided on my current course of action…mostly. I will still try to reach the park manager by phone, to let him know that I
will be filing a formal written complaint with the park and would like a response in kind so there is no confusion. I will be requesting a formal apology as well as notice of their intent to change/create policy regarding BF in their park as well as educate all employees present and future in how to handle complaints regarding BF moms NIP in their park in a positive fashion. I would like a preliminary idea what the response will be. I may have to climb the ladder here as
Elitch Gardens is owned by PARC Management, LLC in Jacksonville, FL. I have to find out who is ultimately responsible for policy in the park.
I will also be filing a formal written complain with the Denver PD requesting a formal apology and similiar education of their employees who I felt should have defended my actions at Elitch Gardens instead of further harassing me. If my efforts at resolution through these channels are not effective, I will investigate as to how to take further legal or other action.

As for a nurse-in, it seems like some people are a bit hot headed at this point and may just make people think what I was doing was just to be rebellious or purposely offend people when I was just trying to have fun at the park and feed my son. I had no idea this would happen and actually fully expected the Denver Police to defend me! I knew my
rights and it scared me when they didn’t. so, I am not really sure what I think of the nurse-in. If the people who show up calmly and quietly nurse and nicely explain to people who ask that it is being done to support me, then maybe it would be ok. If the police asked you to leave though, it would get uglier and that would be bad. It seems a bit unorganized and hastly to me though. If there isn’t a good showing, then the law is more likely to be harsh I would think and it would be easier for Elitch Gardens to deny again that they asked people to leave or called the Denver PD on them.

As for the media goes, I will try to find a non-biased media outlet that reaches more people than this forum in which to tell my true story and inform people in general about the rights we have to NIP.

Since my post from last night is gone, and I did not copy it, it would be nice of MDC to put my post back in the thread if they possibly can. I am not sure how your systems work. I don’t know why it was removed to begin with. Maybe shame on some people for abusing the priviledge?
the gist of it was that anger will not make the changes needed to protect our freedoms, but logical, loving action directed properly will.

I did an interview with Fox, and tried to make my point, but they twisted my story as I naively thought they would not. Here is a copy of the e-mail I sent to reporter John Romero of Fox News earlier this evening:

To John:

I just wanted to let you know that I saw the newscast of the story regarding me feeding my son in public at Elitch Gardens. I am fairlyannoyed by the spin you put on my story and just wanted to clarify a couple points that seemed muddled in the story. I did not feed my baby in public at Elitch Gardens because he was “crying and screaming and very hungry”. I fed him simply because he was hungry. I feed him on demand almost anywhere he is hungry no matter where I am, either in public or in private. He was “crying and screaming and very hungry” because I was not able to focus my attention on him latching on and
feeding correctly as I was dealing with harassment from security and because I was upset, which in turn upset him. Also, I did not need to supervise my children in the wave pool, but simply wanted to watch them have fun. I sat by the pool because it was comfortable and pleasant.

I do appreciate you citing Colorado law to show that I knew my rights. However, it seems you candy-coated the situation a bit and made it seem like it was a desperate situation in which I HAD to feed my son in the manner I did, and made excuses for me when I didn’t need any.  The law was on my side, and law enforcement should have been as well.
Thank you for listening and your time.

Kristin Skrydlak-Simlai

I wonder if he will bother to reply. I definitely learned a lesson here, but I don’t watch the news and now I remember why. My bad…sorry if I hurt the cause.

Well, I am heading home to Spearfish tomorrow as I have many things to take care of, but I will follow my plan of action that I laid out at the beginning of this post, unless my logic takes me elsewhere. I’ve seen some pretty enlightening posts and appreciate them very much; I believe some of the information will be very useful in deciding upon the best course of action to create positive outcomes.

I have been getting many, many emails, and tried to read them all tonight, but do not have time to answer them all, so here is a thanks to all for your support. And to all the people who emailed me that they were offended by my actions, I am sorry that is the case. Many things offend me, and I may or may not complain (mostly not as I try my best to allow everyone their freedoms), but in the end I realize that it is my personal opinion of how the world should be; my conviction. If yours is otherwise, than do what you have to to make the world as you feel it should be….but not in anger.

I think that’s it for now. I hope to be back online tomorrow sometime. I’m going to go snuggle my little one’s now…ahhh and then enjoy our trip home together while we recount the wonderful things we did do and see. I nursed at the top of the mountain by the way. It was SUBLIME! He really seemed to enjoy it as did I.

Love to all the wonderful mommas out there, NIP or not.

Kristin Skrydlak-Simlai

There was a nurse in staged at the park, and here is a story on it, from a local news station:

DENVER – A group of mothers say it is their legal right to breastfeed their children in public.

 

On Saturday, a dozen moms had a “nurse-in” in front of Elitch Gardens to make their point.

They say they wanted to support a woman who claims a security officer at Elitch Gardens told her to cover up or leave the park. A spokesperson for Elitch Gardens says the woman was never asked to leave.

Tammy Lantz is with the Colorado Breastfeeding Task Force.

“Any woman has the right to breastfeed anywhere she has the legal right to be,” Lantz said. “We just want to make sure that women know they have the right to breastfeed; that they shouldn’t be asked to leave anywhere or cover up.”

Lantz says she has heard a lot of comments about nursing.

“They have said things like ‘just cover up’ and ‘breast feeding is a bodily function just like urinating is and you don’t see people urinating out in public.’ Well, there are public restrooms every single place that you go so if there was a public nursing place every single place that we went then we would nurse our babies there,” Lantz said. “We just feed our babies. It’s not meant to be anything sexual. It’s meant to just feed your child.”

The “nurse-in” was organized in support of a Mom who says she nearly kicked out of Elitch Gardens for breastfeeding her son.

Kirstin Skyrdlak-Simlai says she was on the edge of the wave pool breastfeeding when she says she was approached by a park security guard.

On the Web site mothering.com she writes, “He told me that complaints had been made and that I would have to breastfeed elsewhere or cover up.”

Lori Kaupp is the Operations Director at Elitch Gardens. She says Skyrdlak-Simlai was never asked to leave the park. She says in compliance with Colorado law, breastfeeding is allowed.

“The issue wasn’t that she was breast feeding, it was that she was exposed while doing so, making a lot of guests uncomfortable and they brought it to our attention so we did ask her to cover up,” Kaupp said.

Kaupp says there are a lot of guests who may feel uncomfortable with seeing a woman breastfeed and they want to be sensitive to those people.

“We do ask mothers to be considerate for all our guests so that we can provide a comfortable environment for all of our guests,” Kaupp said. She said Skyrdlak-Simlai was exposing most of her breast.

Kenny Gilfilen and his 7-year-old son Matthew just happened upon the nurse-in at Elitch Gardens. He says his wife breastfed his son and he supports the effort wholeheartedly. However, he understands the call for discretion.

“Maybe the people around her would feel more comfortable around her if she were discreet,” Gilfilen said.

Most of the eleven moms at the nurse-in said it is not always practical to cover up the baby with a blanket.

“If it’s hot outside like it is today, I can’t imagine putting a blanket over him. I mean would you want a blanket over your head while you were trying to eat?” Lantz said.

“I don’t think I am being inconsiderate. I don’t think most nursing moms want to flash themselves to the public, but if a baby is hungry you feed them and that is what the law supports,” Cathy Keller said. “You see breasts in beer ads all the time and it’s no big deal and yet when you actually use them for what they are made for, people get up in arms.”

Next Sunday, 1,200 women are expected to come together for the National Mile High Breastfeeding Celebration. The celebration is from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m. at Auraria Campus in Denver. The women will try and set the breastfeeding record at 11:15 a.m. The National Mile High Breastfeeding Celebration is sponsored by the Colorado Breastfeeding Task Force and La Leche League International.

  • Finally, a comment that I received on the original post, from Mara, and also a great thought from Tammy Lantz with the Colorado Breastfeeding Taskforce, (who was quoted in the above story) when she said,

“They have said things like ‘just cover up’ and ‘breast feeding is a bodily function just like urinating is and you don’t see people urinating out in public.’ Well, there are public restrooms every single place that you go so if there was a public nursing place every single place that we went then we would nurse our babies there,” Lantz said. “We just feed our babies. It’s not meant to be anything sexual. It’s meant to just feed your child.” (bold print mine)

We have public restrooms, so why not places where we can nurse our babies ‘discreetly?’  If businesses are so concerned about respecting other guests, then why not respect nursing mothers and make a place for them, where they can actually nurse?

This would be a great step for Elitchs to implement, and maybe other businesses would follow their lead. 

About the only place I can think of, off the top of my head right now in my area, that has a clean and comfortable nursing lounge is Nordstrom in a mall, about half an hour away from me.  It is wonderful to use when I go there, it is in the bathroom, but it is before you get to the stalls, and it is off to the side, away from traffic.  The only way to get to it, is to turn left, after you walk in the bathroom.  If you keep walking straight, then you get to the stalls, so for someone to actually see you nursing, they would have to turn, and go around a wall. 

The lounge has couches, chairs, pillows, and soft lights.  There is also a nook for a double changing station, with SOFT changing tables (not those hard plastic ones), and a sink, so you can nurse and change your baby, all in the same general area.

So KUDOS and HATS OFF to Nordstrom for having the foresight and wisdom to install this lounge for breastfeeding mothers.  I hope other Nordstrom have them as well, and would love to hear from people if they do, or if there are other ‘breastfeeding friendly’ places out there.  I’ll compile them and post them in a future post.

We should support these businesses who do try to accomodate nursing mothers, and let them know we appreciate their efforts. The next time I am in Nordstroms, I am going to ask for the manager, and thank her / him for having that nursing lounge. 

 Perhaps by focusing on the positive, relaying our positive experiences, and thanking those who are supportive about breastfeeding in public, we can also start to change the stigma attached to nursing in public, and get more support from others in the future.

Happy Nursing!!

 

Categories
Breastfeeding Mothering

Oh, The Irony-Breastfeeding in Public

This week, a nursing mother said was harassed and was asked repeatedly to cover herself up, while nursing her 5 month old son, while on vacation at Elitch Gardens, in Denver.

Here is Kristin’s  account of the incident as she posted it on parenting Web site www.mothering.com:

Harassed at Elitch Gardens for public breastfeeding

I am on vacation with my family- 5 of us including mom and dad. We went to Elitch Gardens Theme Park in Denver, CO (Formerly Six Flags).  

I was nursing my 5 month old son by the side of the wave pool in the water park. I was in the section with the plastic lounge chairs where food is allowed, not right in the water. I was approached by a park security guard who told me that complaints had been made and that I would have to breastfeed elsewhere or cover up; go to the restrooms and nurse or use a towel.

I stated that by Colorado state law, I am allowed to breastfeed my child anywhere public or private that he is allowed to be. At this point another security guard got involved and was more adamant that I go elsewhere and it is just “common sense” to cover up or be elsewhere. I repeatedly stated colorado breastfeeding law and informed them that I was not going anywhere or covering up (he hates being covered up), could they please stop harassing me and let me feed my child. He stated they would kick me out of the park for this. I stated that I paid for the tickets and was not going anywhere as I was not breaking any posted park rules.

At this point my child was getting more and more upset because I was having a hard time focusing on holding him and helping him latch on properly. This conversation progressed until my son was screaming very loudly at the top of his lungs and I was visibly shaking and upset. I did start to get louder but managed to keep my temper despite my child crying. I did however start crying too and begged them to leave me be. They called a supervisor over to talk to me. At this point my husband had come back from playing with the other children in the wave pool and I asked him to back me up and keep them away from me so I could nurse my child as he was screaming. He proceeded to state them the same law repeatedly.

They then left me alone for a few minutes and returned shortly later with two Denver Police officers. I continued the basic same conversation with them and then let my husband talk to them, but the supervisor continued to harass me thro this entire thing. He kept stating it was “common sense” to do what he wanted me to do and I kept stating Colorado Law and stating that I had no such social taboo ingrained in me about breastfeeding in public and it was his personal opinion that it is common sense.

My husband kept trying to get them to stop talking to me so I could feed my child, and I was finally able to feed my child and he fell asleep. I then pulled my swimsuit back up and rocked him a bit. The Denver Police then informed me that if I breastfed in public in the park again, they would arrest me for trespassing as the park would want to kick me out. I politely told him to do what you have to do but I know my rights. I stayed in the water park section until the baby woke up and then left to try to enjoy the rest of the day away from the frightening guards. (as a note, it was the woman next to me who had complained and she proceeded to berate me for about 10 minutes. I repeatedly told her very calmly and politely “Thank you for your opinion. Have a nice day”, until she stopped talking to me.)

I am ashamed to admit that I did feed my child next in a more secluded part of the park later as I did not want to get arrested and ruin my family’s vacation, although it was still in a public area. It makes me shake and cry when I think of my treatment and how I had to hide just to feed my child. It made me feel like a criminal. I am going to look into suing the park so that others in the future will not be subjected to the same traumatizing ordeal. Maybe the park can setup some positive breastfeeding policy.

I will also be posting to a number of forums such as Mothering.com to inform others of my situation, maybe organize a boycott or nurse-in. Thank you for listening. I would appreciate any feedback you have or any info you have as to legal or other recourse that I may take that would be most effective in changing Elitch Gardens actions against breastfeeding in public.

Kristin Skrydlak-Simlai

 I find this incident terribly ironic- in that where it happened, there are probably no less than hundreds of women of all ages, walking around in swimsuits / bikinis that expose more of the breast than what a mother breastfeeding her baby would show.  Of course, I don’t know how much of her breast was ‘exposed’ but I wonder if the lady who was so offended, asked all the women who were in skimpy swimsuits to cover up as well? 

According the Elitch spokesperson, (from 9News story https://www.9news.com/news/article.aspx?storyid=72030) she said the “park allows breastfeeding, but they ask breastfeeding mother’s to respect the comfort level of other guests of the park.”

The lady organizing the nurse in, Tirzha Zabarauskas, said in respond to this statement, “I am sure being at a water park there were other women in bikinis who were not asked to cover themselves up or leave the park.”

I have to agree with her on this point- if you have been swimming lately at any public swimming place, the swimsuits really don’t leave much to the imagination- between tops that barely, and I mean, barely cover anything, and thong bottoms, it seems ridiculous that someone would have the audacity to complain that a NURSING MOTHER, FEEDING HER BABY, was offensive.

How many other boobs did this lady see, flopping around in skimpy bathing suits that day?  Did she complain about those?  Did she complain about the butts hanging out of the thong bikini bottoms?  Did the guards and police, stop the people in reveling bathing suits, and tell them to use some “common sense” and cover up?

It is just pure ignorance that in this day and age, with all the benefits of breastfeeding, that a nursing mother gets treated this way, especially when it is in a water park, with hundreds, probably thousands of other women in swimming suits, no doubt exposing some part of their breasts.

Our society doesn’t have a problem with showing breasts when it is in a commercial, walking down the street, at Hooters, or at the beach, pool, or water park- the problem is when a woman chooses to use her breasts for what they were designed for- feeding her baby.  For some reason, we have a huge problem with that, and have to resort to making the mother feel bad, dirty, ashamed, and like she did something wrong.

I hope Elitch Gardens works with this mother to ensure this never happens again to another nursing mother.  There is a nurse-in scheduled at the park tomorrow, but after reading some comments from Jennifer, at The Lactivist blog, she has some good reasons, why nurse-in’s probably aren’t the most effective first steps to take. 

In the meantime, the only thing I think we can all do to make a difference is nurse, nurse, nurse, in public.  The more people see us doing what nature intended for our babies, the more it will become more common place, and hopefully these incidents will stop happening.